The table shows data about the average income for one person in dollars, across two different age groups: under 18 and over 60, as well as the percentage of the poor population in three states in the US, namely California, Utah, and Florida

The table shows data about the average income for one person in dollars, across two different age groups: under 18 and over 60, as well as the percentage of the poor population in three states in the US, namely California, Utah, and Florida
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The diagram illustrates the average earning per person in dollars for two age categories of under 18 and over 60, and the proportions of the
people
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living in poverty in the states of
California
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, Utah, and
Florida
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in the US.
Over all
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Overall
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, it is noticeable that
California
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has the largest
group
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of poor
people
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, and the richest average individual,
while
Linking Words
Utal has the least one.
In addition
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, Utal has the biggest
group
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of youth under 18 and the least elders over 60, and
contrast
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in contrast
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Florida
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has the least young
people
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and most old inhabitants. The average income per person in
California
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is 23000$, followed by
Florida
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at 22000$, and utal is the lowest one at 17000$ individually. The percentage of
people
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living in poor in
California
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is 16%, followed by
Florida
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and Utal at 12% and 95 respectively. When it comes to age, the
group
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under 18 accounts for 28% in Utal, 17% in
California
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, and 16% in
Florida
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.
However
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, Utal has only 8% old
people
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over 60 years old,
while
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the same
group
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in
California
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occupied 13%, and 23% for
Florida
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.
Submitted by mikezhao223 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, california, florida, group with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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