The charts below show the percentages of men and women aged 60-64 in employment in four countries in 1970 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentages of men and women aged 60-64 in employment in four countries in 1970 and 2000.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph above shows the percentage of the two genders aged between 60 to 64 in
employment
Use synonyms
in four countries in 1970 and 2000 .
Overall
Linking Words
/ the
men
Change noun form
men's
show examples
chart
display
Correct subject-verb agreement
displays
show examples
that the
employment
Use synonyms
numbers
got
Verb problem
went
show examples
down
however
Linking Words
the
Use synonyms
women
Change noun form
women's
show examples
employment
Use synonyms
did not
changed
Change the verb form
change
show examples
a lot . The Belgium men got a huge drop from 79
employment
Use synonyms
to approximately 20
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
but USA and Japan had a slide by around the fifth
also
Linking Words
the Australian men got down by 30
employment
Use synonyms
. On the other side the
Use synonyms
women
Change noun form
women's
show examples
chart shows that
Belgium
Correct your spelling
Belgian
show examples
women
Use synonyms
got
Verb problem
went
show examples
down by only one woman
also
Linking Words
Japanese
women
Use synonyms
almost
got
Verb problem
went
show examples
down by 2
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in addition
Linking Words
both
Australian
Correct your spelling
Australia
show examples
and
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
increased by a little over ten
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Submitted by khalidashgar23 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words employment, women with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment rate
  • percentage
  • trend
  • significant change
  • overall employment
  • societal changes
  • economic conditions
  • government policies
  • compare
  • highlight
  • individual country analysis
  • increased/decreased
  • similarities and differences
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