The graphs below ptovide information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2000 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2000 and 2010.

#graphs #ptovide #information #computer #ownership #percentage #population #level #education #years

The bar graphs below provide details about the percentage of laptop owners

as well as

their level of education between 2000 and 2010. Units are measured in percentages.

Overall

population

Add an article

the population

show examples

of PC purchasing showed an upward trend throughout the period

while

property by education level saw a similar rise. Despite

this

, the lowest number of

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

who possessed technic

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

those with no high school diploma,

whereas

the opposite was true with postgraduate degrees.

Initially

, 50% of personal computer users in 2000,

whereas

more than 75% owned one in 2010. The second most popular year for PC was 2008 with more than 76% owning a data processor.

However

, the percentage of holders in 2002 and 2004 was almost the same (60% and 65%, respectively). A noticeable trend showed that the higher the education level the higher the percentage of

desktop’s

Change noun form

desktop

show examples

proprietors. Individuals with no high school diploma had the lowest

technology

Correct quantifier usage

number of technology

show examples

users which was approximately 25%,

while

people with postgraduate degrees had the highest number of equipment which was well over 75%.

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Wed Jul 31 2024

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task achievement

Make sure to accurately describe the information presented in the graphs. Using the correct terminology such as 'computer' instead of 'laptop', and 'ownership' instead of 'property' or 'holders' will enhance clarity.

coherence cohesion

Including linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more smoothly, such as 'additionally', 'in contrast', and 'as a result', can improve coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

Ensure all details are covered comprehensively. For example, mentioning specific percentages consistently and accurately enhances completeness.

coherence cohesion

Conclude your essay with a summarizing statement that encapsulates the overall trends observed.

coherence cohesion

Overall structure of the essay is clear, with a good introduction and body paragraphs.

task achievement

Important trends and comparisons between years and education levels are correctly identified and discussed.

coherence cohesion

There is a logical flow of information from general trends to specific details.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

172 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

6.5

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The graphs below ptovide information about computer ownership as a percentage of the population between 2000 and 2010, and by level of education for the years 2000 and 2010.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people get into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t ‎afford.What are the reasons for this behaviour?What action can be taken ‎to prevent people having this problem?

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some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their subjects, other believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for all qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own view.