IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

you are soon going to spend three months doing work experiance in an organisation

#three #months #work #experiance #organisation
Dear Sir,
Firstly
, I would like to say how appreciate the opportunity to do
this
work
. I hope to learn new strategies,
techniques
Correct word choice
and techniques
show examples
 which I can use with my
work
 experience. I would like to provide you the
work
 experience which can be positive for the organisation.
Firstly
, I have a lot of experience from my
last
 job, where I have been worked
a
Change preposition
as a
show examples
hotel manager and I took care
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 10 employees. I think that I
havevery
Correct your spelling
have very
 strong organisation skills, I love
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
working in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 team.
Secondly
, I am a friendly person.
Thirdly
, I am young and don´t have children and I can
work
 more
flexible
Change the word
flexibly
show examples
. I am so
exited
Correct your spelling
excited
show examples
 to
work
 with you. Kind regards Andrea Kroupova
Submitted by andrea.kroupova on

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introduction conclusion present
Try to provide a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your letter effectively.
logical structure
Ensure logical structuring of ideas with appropriate paragraphs to enhance coherence. For example, separate your experience from your personal qualities.
supported main points
Provide more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your points. Mentioning specific skills or tasks you performed as a hotel manager could help.
complete response
You have clearly understood the task and provided a response that covers the main requirements, including your work experience and personal qualities.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your intention to contribute positively to the organization is well-expressed and clear.
relevant specific examples
The letter is polite and expresses genuine enthusiasm to work with the organization.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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