IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

You bought a TV a week ago but when you got home you discovered it did not work properly. You called customer service to report the problem but you have not yet received any help.

#tv #week #home #work #customer #service #report #help
Dear Sir/Madam. I am writing in order to complain about a
TV
 I bought a week ago. I always try to get newer gadgets from your store. And
this
 time one of your workers gave me details of the
TV
 I bought like
price
Add an article
the price
show examples
 of the
TV
,
TV
ʼs latest upgrades and many more.
However
, after I get to home and turned on the
TV
 with high expectations, your
TV
shows
Wrong verb form
showed
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we
Correct pronoun usage
us
show examples
 the word "Welcome" on the screen, which
supposed
Add a missing verb
is supposed
show examples
 to be a "Samsung". So I instantly
open
Wrong verb form
opened
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 settings of the
TV
 and after checking the
TV
's ID number, I found out that it was fake. As
this
TV
 is fake, it
lag
Change the verb form
lags
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 so much that my
10 year old
Add a hyphen
10-year-old
show examples
TV
 is better than that. If I had not paid attention to the
TV
's logo on its manuals, I would have paid for nothing.
In addition
 to
this
Add a comma
this,
show examples
while
TV
Add an article
the TV
show examples
 was delivering from your store,
TV's
Correct article usage
the TV's
show examples
 screen scratched up and as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 result of the
scratch
Add a comma
scratch,
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 there were black dots. I would be grateful if you
change
Wrong verb form
changed
show examples
 that employee to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 more experienced one I look forward to receiving your explanation and a full refund Yours faithfully Safarov Abrorjon
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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task achievement
Ensure to provide a more structured approach to your complaint. Each paragraph should handle a specific aspect of the issue.
coherence cohesion
Use transition words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and ideas.
task achievement
Clarify the action you want the company to take (e.g., a refund, a replacement), to make your request clear.
task achievement
You've clearly stated the problem with the TV and provided specific details about the issues faced.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a polite but firm tone, appropriate for a letter of complaint.
task achievement
Your writing provides relevant specifics, such as the 'Welcome' screen and the scratched screen, which strengthen your complaint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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