IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The table below shows the proportion of the workforce who are women and the proportion of managers who are women in five different countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the proportion of the workforce who are women and the proportion of managers who are women in five different countries. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The presented table compares data about how many people who are managers or workforce are women in 5 various countries.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is important that the best country which has a lot of women who are working is the US, but Japan has a lot of workforce.
While
Linking Words
 Egypt has fewer employees who are females.
According to
Linking Words
 the chart, the main country which has a lot of labour force is Japan with 48%;
however
Linking Words
, for
Fix the agreement mistake
managers
show examples
manager
Add a comma
manager,
show examples
 it was only 17%. The US, the second
one
Use synonyms
 for labour force but the first
one
Use synonyms
 with Astraliala for manager, is 2% less than Japan in the first item, and it has 43% for the second
one
Use synonyms
. The picture shows the third level for the workforce is the same between Australia and Sri Lanka at 42%;
additionally
Linking Words
, Australia has the first level with the US in the manager;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, Sri Lanka has the
last
Linking Words
 level in
this
Linking Words
 thing by 9%.
In addition
Linking Words
, the proportion of Egypt, which has the roughly minimum percentage in two categories, is 20% for labour forces and 12% for another
one
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words one with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: