In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Many people have to leave their
house
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houses
show examples
and family in
orded
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order
to get a
jod
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job
.In my opinion,
advantages
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the advantages
show examples
of moving away in aims at finding work
outweights
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outweigh
disadvantages
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the disadvantages
show examples
, because it stands the chance of having
higher
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a higher
show examples
lifelihood
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likelihood
livelihood
and upgrading life. Moving away from your hometown might leave you homesick.Leaving your family and fellows at once can be emotionally tough since one
have
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has
show examples
already built strong
relationship
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relationships
show examples
and connections .Many people, dwelling in another place to work regret about decision
detaching
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to detach
show examples
from their family,
subsequently
they may be lonely and
trap
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trapped
show examples
into
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in
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sadness.
In addition
, if an early adult
have
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has
show examples
just left the house they are going to face music
with
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while
show examples
keeping household
and
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apply
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chores. To illustrate, men who moved to a new city alone might really struggle
at cooking
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to cook
show examples
himself
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themselves
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a meal or
cleaning
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clean
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thir
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their
clothes.
However
, in comparison with merits, moving away poses only possibilities, and
feeling
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the feeling
show examples
of
homesick
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homesickness
show examples
and inability to run chores is another chance to develop. The forte of moving away from your relatives and friends is the career
oppurtunities
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opportunities
that you can find in
different
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a different
show examples
city or country. In
pursuits
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pursuit
show examples
of making a bundle people flock to developed cities to get a
jod
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job
and provide for their family .It is evident that workers in
industriliezed
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industrialized
country's
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countries
show examples
remuneration
is
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are
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twice more
than
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as
show examples
in their homeland.
Moreover
, if one seeks to uplift their life level, residing and working in a big company can provide it. Life in big cities facilitates some nuisances of small towns ,
sush
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such
as transportation, food assortment and
tecnology
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technology
. In summary,
merits
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the merits
show examples
of moving away present more perks in means of
wage
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wages
show examples
and lifestyle. Demerits of
this
are insignificant because they can be solved for your own development and
Correct your spelling
advantage
advantege
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advantage
Submitted by zhaniya.azhdarova on

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task achievement
To achieve a higher score for task achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the prompt comprehensively. Expand on how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages with more precise and detailed examples or evidence. Clarify the points you make by providing specific scenarios or statistical information if possible.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, try to structure your essay more clearly. Use more paragraphing to separate your ideas, and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Improve the logical flow by ensuring that each idea links well to the preceding and following ones.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear opinion on the topic and attempts to balance the discussion of both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
There is an evident effort to maintain a logical structure in the essay with an introduction and conclusion, which helps in maintaining coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocation
  • employment prospects
  • professional development
  • cultural exposure
  • isolation
  • familial relationships
  • cost of living
  • career progression
  • mental health
  • significant life events
  • higher salaries
  • support families
  • broaden horizons
  • living standards
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