The chart below shows the percentage of men and women who did various leisure time activities in England in 2006.

#percentage #men #women #leisure #time #activities #england

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The graph illustrates the proportion of

men

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and

women

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who did different activities in their free

time

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in England in 2006.

overall

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, watching TV is the most popular activity out of all and the least is playing computer games.

Furthermore

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, in shopping, there is a huge difference between the usage of genders.

To begin

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with, watching TV is the most used by both

women

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and

men

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in their free

time

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, with nearly 80%.

Moreover

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women

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played computer games almost half of the

men

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and even combined of their

time

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spent in the least compared to the others. In 2006,

men

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did not go shopping in their leisure

time

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Furthermore

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, the internet used by

men

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is double that of

women

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like computer games. spending

time

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with family, doing sports or exercise and reading have an average of 79, 77 and 75 per cent respectively. None of them exceeded 80 per cent in both

women

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and

men

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except when watching TV.

Submitted by amir.lajevardi84 on Sat Aug 17 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, time with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

159 words

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The chart below shows the percentage of men and women who did various leisure time activities in England in 2006.

Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?

Some people believe that manufacturers should be responsible for reducing the large amounts of packaging they use. Others say consumers should avoid buying heavily packaged items. Discuss both views and state your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your experience.

Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men. To what extent do you agree ordisagree?

Studies show that crime rates are lower among those with educational degrees. Therefore, the best way to reduce the crime rate is to educate criminals while they are still in prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?