IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 1

The diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 1
#electricity #power #station #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The depicted diagram illustrates the process of
electricity
 generated in a hydroelectric
power
 station.
Overall
,
this
power
 station works with rivers and generates
electricity
 that helps us to get more
power
 from these elements.After these
actions
Add a comma
actions,
show examples
 we will get hydroelectric electric
water
power
.
Also
,
flow
Add an article
the flow
show examples
 of
water
 to generate
electricity
 works both at night and daytime.
After
this
, they will generate the
water
 and
then
 reverse turbines with an operating generator at daylight, and at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
night time pumping
water
 into
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
 reservoirs. Looking at the picture in detail, these generators can generate
electricity
 from the aqua scheme. All in all,
this
 diagram shows
water
power
 more accurately than the other sources.
Furthermore
, at night, the excess
water
 is pumped back from the low-level reservoir to the high-level reservoir so that it can be reused, but
this
 electrical
power
 is generated in a dynamoelectric 
power
 system.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, power, water with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • hydroelectric power station
  • reservoir
  • potential energy
  • mechanical energy
  • electrical energy
  • turbine
  • generator
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • emissions
  • power lines
  • gate-controlled tunnels
  • gravity-driven
  • transformation
  • clean energy source
  • sustainable
  • recycled water
  • mountainous area
  • activate
  • transmit
What to do next:
Look at other essays: