The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

#value #country #exports #categories #percentage #change #category

The chart illustrates the amount of money from exporting petroleum

products

, engineered goods, gems and jewellery, agricultural

products

textiles

Correct word choice

and textiles

show examples

in 2015 and 2016,

as well as

the table compares

rates

Change the noun form

rate

show examples

changes for each category. Units are measured in

billions

Change preposition

of dollar

show examples

dollar

Fix the agreement mistake

dollars

show examples

and percentages.

Overall

, it is evident that the number of sales for gems and

jewellry

Correct your spelling

jewellery

decreased throughout the period,

while

others increased. In terms of the highest product sold, petroleum

products

stood at $60

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

in 2015 and ended at $62

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

in 2016.

This

number was followed by engineered goods that sold around $55

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and rose moderately by 8.5%

Change preposition

apply

show examples

. Meanwhile, gems and

jewellry

Correct your spelling

jewellery

which started at $43

billions

Fix the agreement mistake

billion

show examples

witnessed a moderate decline at $40

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

. Regarding the remaining country exports, agricultural

products

had $31

billions

Fix the agreement mistake

billion

show examples

sales in 2015, rose

sligthly

Correct your spelling

slightly

by 0.81%.

Finally

, as the smallest export

products

Fix the agreement mistake

product

show examples

, textiles began at $25

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

Whereas

, the percentages of

this

product experienced a significant growth by 15.24% over the period.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Thu Aug 22 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words products, billions with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "moderately" was used 2 times.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

161 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

export value
trend analysis
anomalies
percentage change
sector analysis
global demand
domestic production
economic conditions
technological advancements
international regulations
economic growth
trade relations

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The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think it is more important to provide parks and sports facilities than to provide shopping centers in these new town for people to spend their free time. To what extent doo you agree or disagree?

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some think that printed books are not necessary in the digital era, because all writing can be stored electronically. Others think printed books still play an important role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that it is more imprtant to spend money on roads and motorwawys than on public transport system such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagree?