IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Food travels thousands of miles from producers to customers. Some people think that it would be better for the environment and economy if people only ate the local food produced by farmers. Advantages and disadvantages.

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Losgistic
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Logistic
Logistics
 of
food
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 normally takes up more than 50% of the
food
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 cost as
food
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 travels a long way from producers to customers if it is imported.
Therefore
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, some people
sugggested
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suggested
 that it would benefit the
environment
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 and economy if people only eat local
food
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products
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by
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from
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 local farmers. On the positive aspect, eating local
food
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 can help raise the income of local farmers and
therefore
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, benefits the total national economy based on some empirical
evidence based
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evidence-based
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 research done by scholars. The scholars
also
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 suggested that our
environment
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 is actually a mirco ecosystem and what comes from the soil will go back to the soil eventually.
Thus
Linking Words
, eating local
products
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conserve
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conserves
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 the local
environment
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 in theory
while
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 consuming imported
food
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products
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 would produce tons of
carbon
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 footprints and damage our
earth
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earth's
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 ecosystem.
On the other hand
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, opponents suggested that despite producing
carbon
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 footprints, consuming imported
products
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promote
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promotes
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 global trade business and
help
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helps
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 improve international trading
relationship
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relationships
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. Trading has been seen as a type of cultural exchange since
the
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apply
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ancient
time
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times
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 and
Silk
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the Silk
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road
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Road
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 is a very typical representation of it. At the same time, they provided some empirical evidence that consuming
food
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 from different attitudes allows the body to intake more various kinds of nutrients and
therefore
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,
it
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apply
show examples
help
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helps
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 to reduce certain kinds of serious diseases
such
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 as heart diseases and cancers. For
examples
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example
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, Chinese people believe that eating mushrooms
from
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with
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high
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a high
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 attitude helps to lower blood pressure and eventually
lower
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lowers
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 the chance of heart disease in
human
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humans
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. In conclusion, some nutrients can only be found in certain types of
food
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 and those
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food
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foods
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 can only be imported. If we wish to balance body health, economy and
environment
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,
importation
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the importation
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 of
food
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 should not be banned completely but
instead
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, we can maintain it at a certain level
by
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through
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 taxation and laws. Regarding
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environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 and
carbon
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 footprint, there are some new electrical transportation methods which can greatly reduce
carbon
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emission
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emissions
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 and
it
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apply
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also
Linking Words
 lowers the cost of logistics at the same time.

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task achievement
The essay broadly addresses the task prompt and covers both advantages and disadvantages of eating local food. However, try to provide clearer and more detailed examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
While the essay has a logical structure, some sentences could be organized more logically to enhance cohesion. For instance, you could present contrasting points in closer proximity for clearer comparison.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining individual sentences to improve clarity and flow. Checking for grammatical and spelling errors will also enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure for the reader.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view, addressing both the environmental/economic benefits of eating local food as well as the cultural and health benefits of imported food. This shows a thorough understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • global warming
  • chemical preservatives
  • local economy
  • employment
  • reinstate
  • nutritious
  • public health outcomes
  • supply chains
  • political instability
  • natural disasters
  • pandemics
  • dietary diversity
  • economies of scale
  • seasonal availability
  • preserved foods
  • nutritional value
  • crop failures
  • food shortages
  • economic instability
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