In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
one of the
grate
issues of these days is finding Correct your spelling
great
appropriate
Add an article
an appropriate
job
which the public should emigrate and leave their hometowns and family and friends.
I subscribe to the notion that questing for appropriate
occupation is more important than living and conserving family Correct article usage
an appropriate
relationship
on friendship because of bearing Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
agreeable
future.
Correct article usage
an agreeable
this
idea has some downsides, firstly
, emigrating to another countries
might cloud the Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
relation
between friends because immigrants are obsessed with Replace the word
relationship
novel
Add an article
the novel
problem
of Fix the agreement mistake
problems
host
Correct article usage
the host
country
Change the noun form
countries
such
as language and cost of living which people do not have time to consume
with their family and friends, Verb problem
spend
for instance
when my brother went to Italy in order to create new life, he has not found time to make interaction with us, beside
a family affinity would be disappeared. Replace the word
besides
secondly
, it is possible that searching occopation
in another state bear influence on homeland culture and religion leading to Correct your spelling
occupation
forget
an Change the verb form
forgetting
orginality
.
Correct your spelling
originality
on the other hand
, finding job
in Add an article
a job
distinct
country has a quite number of Correct article usage
a distinct
upside
, first of all, some various Fix the agreement mistake
upsides
of
Change preposition
apply
occopations
have strike value in some nations Correct your spelling
occupations
for example
, medcine
and Correct your spelling
medicine
nurse
would able to earn handsome income in some states located near Persian gulf which Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
this nations
would provide and guarantee Change the determiner
this nation
these nations
job
prospect and job
security meanwhile they will assure notable pension for living tranquil in future, additionally
, making intraction
with new people and Correct your spelling
interaction
imoparting
different experience and acquire novel knowledge are another benefit of working in Correct your spelling
imparting
new
situation which they pave the way in order to achieve Add an article
a new
beneficial
qualification and high disposable income.
as outlined above, Add an article
a beneficial
the beneficial
benefits
of working in different states are more than side effects which need to Correct article usage
the benefits
gratuated
people and adept Correct your spelling
graduate
work force
Correct your spelling
workforce
find
Fix the infinitive
to find
appropriate
Add an article
an appropriate
position
in Fix the agreement mistake
positions
another nations
which meet their needs.Replace the adjective
another nation
other nations
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introduction conclusion
Your introduction needs to clearly state the topic and outline the main points you will discuss. Consider rephrasing it for better clarity and engagement.
logical structure
The structure of your essay can be improved by using clear topic sentences at the start of each paragraph and ensuring each main point is well-developed and supported with relevant examples.
supported main points
Work on your paragraphing by ensuring each paragraph focuses on a single idea, and this idea is clearly related to your main argument. Avoid mixing multiple ideas in a single paragraph.
clear comprehensive ideas
Make sure to clarify your ideas and avoid ambiguous phrases. Ensure your points are elaborated clearly, and avoid grammar mistakes that can obscure meaning.
relevant specific examples
Use more specific and relatable examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay and make your points more convincing.
complete response
You have addressed both advantages and disadvantages, which shows a balanced consideration of the topic.
relevant specific examples
You have attempted to provide examples, which is crucial for supporting your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.