IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The figures provide info about economic growth and household expenditure across a variety of categories. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The figures provide info about economic growth and household expenditure across a variety of categories. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#figures #info #growth #household #expenditure #variety #categories #summarise #information #features #comparisons
Two
Correct article usage
The two
show examples
 figures below provide information on economic growth and
breakdown
Correct article usage
the breakdown
show examples
 of household expenditures.
Overall
 the economic growth fluctuated throughout the following period. Experiencing both increases and decreases.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
show examples
 the household expenses faced minor changes in some categories. In the first picture,
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
economic
Replace the word
economy
show examples
 was stable
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1995 until 2000,
then
 in 2005 it went through a slight boost from
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zero to five. But it immediately came across a decline reaching a negative growth rate in 2010.
Second
Change the article
The second
show examples
 figure showcases the rate of household
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
 in 1995, 2000, 2005 and 2010.
It is clear that
 even if there is not a big difference between these years, there are still some trivial contrasts. By 2005, housing remained the top expenditure category, but food and entertainment began to account for more significant portions of the budget. In 2010, housing still dominated,
although
 food and travel expenditures
also
 increased slightly,
while
 clothing and entertainment spending slightly declined.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "figures" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: