IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The figures provide info about economic growth and household expenditure across a variety of categories. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The figures provide info about economic growth and household expenditure across a variety of categories. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#figures #info #growth #household #expenditure #variety #categories #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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Two
Correct article usage
The two
show examples
 figures below provide information on economic growth and
breakdown
Correct article usage
the breakdown
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 of household expenditures.
Overall
Linking Words
 the economic growth fluctuated throughout the following period. Experiencing both increases and decreases.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
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 the household expenses faced minor changes in some categories. In the first picture,
Correct article usage
the economic
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economic
Replace the word
economy
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 was stable
in
Change preposition
from
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 1995 until 2000,
then
Linking Words
 in 2005 it went through a slight boost from
a
Correct article usage
apply
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zero to five. But it immediately came across a decline reaching a negative growth rate in 2010.
Second
Change the article
The second
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 figure showcases the rate of household
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
 in 1995, 2000, 2005 and 2010.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 even if there is not a big difference between these years, there are still some trivial contrasts. By 2005, housing remained the top expenditure category, but food and entertainment began to account for more significant portions of the budget. In 2010, housing still dominated,
although
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 food and travel expenditures
also
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 increased slightly,
while
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 clothing and entertainment spending slightly declined.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "figures" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 3 times.
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