You would like a job working in the summer camp which runs sports and outdoor activities for children and young people. Write a letter to the organisers of the summer camp. In your letter: describe your personality say what relevant experience and skills you have explain what sort of work you would like to do.
#job #summer #camp #sports #activities #children #people #organisers #personality #skills #sort #work
Dear Sir,
I hope
this
letter finds you in best of the spirits and radiant health. I am writing this
letter to let you know that I am interested in doing a job at the summer camp organised by you.
I am a professional Cricket player, currently, studing
Correct your spelling
studying
Sports
Physiology at National College. I am a sports
enthusiast and I am a very competitive individual. I played a few state level
tournaments and performed well on many occasions for my team. My team management always Add a hyphen
state-level
rely
on me for my consistency and never Change the verb form
relies
loosing
Replace the word
losing
atitude
.
Correct your spelling
altitude
attitude
Moreover
, being a student of sports
physio course, I am giving my services at a local football club, which trains junior players. I got
a few years of experience in treating minor Verb problem
have
sports
injuries, which happens
Correct subject-verb agreement
happen
while
playing on the field.
In the end, I could prove to be an asset for
you because Change preposition
to
this
camp is organised for young ones and teenagers. Most likely, in order to, perform well they usually ended up hurting themselves. Therefore
, I could treat them to get better soon and teach them how to avoid such
incidents because of my experience at the football club.
I hope you will give me a chance to serve you and I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Yours faithfully,
Jatinder.Submitted by mrsdns on
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task achievement
Your response is complete and addresses all parts of the task. However, you could improve by giving more specific examples and details regarding your experiences.
coherence cohesion
Your letter has a logical structure but can be improved with clearer paragraph breaks and transitions. Ensure each paragraph has a single main idea.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are appropriate and polite. This adds a professional touch to your letter.
task achievement
Your letter maintains a suitable and respectful tone throughout, making it appropriate for a formal job application.