Studies have shown that unemployment has a bad effect on both the physical and mental health of people without a job. For this reason, governments need to create jobs for everyone who wants one. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Researchers have found that
people
who have no job
are suffering from some physical and mental health problems. Therefore
, governments
should vary job
opportunities
for jobless citizens. This
essay agrees with the statement because it is certain that people
should work
and earn money to survive and live healthily. Moreover
, governments
should allocate more funding to reduce unemployment rates.
In the modern world, people
ought to work
to survive and live in comfort. Otherwise
, they cannot meet their requirements in social life. Individuals should follow some routines and have some tasks to complete. Every task individuals complete makes them happy and gives meaning to their lives. Otherwise
, they feel useless and this
feeling makes them sick. Moreover
, mental weakness causes physical health problems. They should break this
repeating cycle by finding a job
and working on it.
On the other hand
, governments
should enhance job
opportunities
. Thus
, they should make some deals with companies and factories. Furthermore
, governments
offer subsidies and tax reductions to the
companies to find new Correct article usage
apply
job
opportunities
for the
unemployed citizens. Correct article usage
apply
Besides
, governments
may set up new projects to increase job
opportunities
. People
always want to work
in the jobs they are interested in, so governments
should ask unemployed people
their willing.
In conclusion, people
without a job
cannot survive in modern life. Therefore
, they have to find a job
and work
on them. Otherwise
, they cannot find a place for themselves in society. The lack of social life and money makes them sick. On the other hand
, governments
should make some agreements with companies and factories to provide more job
opportunities
. In addition
, they should find out people
's willingness and vary opportunities
according to
these willings
.Correct your spelling
killings
Submitted by a.muratdemircan on
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task achievement
Ensure that each main point is supported by detailed and specific examples to strengthen your argument. General statements need concrete evidence to be compelling.
task achievement
Develop your main points more comprehensively. While the essay addresses key aspects, it would be stronger with a more thorough explanation and argumentation for each point.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between paragraphs and ideas. Ensure that transitions between different parts of the essay are smooth and coherent.
coherence cohesion
Include a brief summary of your main points in the conclusion to reinforce your argument. This helps in maintaining a strong structure and coherence throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your introduction is clear and sets a strong premise for the essay by stating your position and what the essay will cover.
coherence cohesion
The language used is generally clear and effective, making your points easy to understand.
coherence cohesion
There are effective transitions and logical progression in most parts of the essay, which aids in readability and coherence.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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