Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business.Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts.

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In
this
modern era, in spite of
art
being a great deal for all cultures on the planet,
people
seem interested in science, technology and businesses.
Therefore
, few
people
appreciate works of
art
.
This
essay will give
reasons
to explain
this
trend and provide some possible solutions for improving the
art
industry. On the one hand, there are several
reasons
that were proven true to explain why
people
in the present are not keen on
art
. Some individuals believe that
art
has an old-fashioned spirit and is not suitable for today's modern life because
art
can be created more easily today. Life requires us to always be busy and have many other concerns with work, family and children, so we don’t have enough time to enjoy
art
.
For example
, there are many AI technologies for creating
art
and many exhibitions of
art
are opened worldwide but the number of visitors is small. Those
reasons
are considered as the main factors that lead to
this
instance.
On the other hand
,
besides
these above
reasons
Add a comma
reasons,
show examples
we can consider solutions for
this
situation. In my opinion, the main solution that can encourage society to believe in
art
again
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
would be teaching them compulsory courses in schools. By investigating children, the next generation will be connected to
art
and notice its true value.
Moreover
, allocating some budget by the government to advertising arts can be an effective idea to turn the community's interest back.
For instance
, now, game shows not only focus on providing useful knowledge about
art
, life and society
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
inspire
people
to pay more attention to
art
. In conclusion, it is notable that most adolescents refuse to enter the
art
industry because of the uncertainty in employment and the unstable income.
This
problem can be dealt with by organizing jobs for artists and making connections between different fields.
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task achievement
To achieve a higher score, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that is fully developed. Some points are not fully expanded.
coherence cohesion
You can improve coherence and cohesion by making smoother transitions between your ideas and paragraphs. Linking words and phrases can help with this.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This would make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Conclude your essay with a summary of the main points discussed. This would enhance the structure and completeness of your response.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which sets the stage and wraps up the discussion effectively.
task achievement
You have presented both reasons for the decline in interest in art and potential solutions to the issue, which shows a balanced approach.
overall
The language used is clear and free from major grammatical errors, making the essay easy to read and understand.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Technological advancement
  • Economic growth
  • STEM subjects
  • Job security
  • Financial success
  • Pragmatic
  • Utilitarian pursuits
  • Art education
  • Inclusive
  • Engaging
  • Contemporary society
  • Social issues
  • Environmental themes
  • Digital platforms
  • Virtual museums
  • Interactive art
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