Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business.Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts.

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this

Linking Words

modern era, in spite of

art

Use synonyms

being a great deal for all cultures on the planet,

people

Use synonyms

seem interested in science, technology and businesses.

Therefore

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, few

people

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appreciate works of

art

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This

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essay will give

reasons

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to explain

this

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trend and provide some possible solutions for improving the

art

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industry. On the one hand, there are several

reasons

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that were proven true to explain why

people

Use synonyms

in the present are not keen on

art

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. Some individuals believe that

art

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has an old-fashioned spirit and is not suitable for today's modern life because

art

Use synonyms

can be created more easily today. Life requires us to always be busy and have many other concerns with work, family and children, so we don’t have enough time to enjoy

art

Use synonyms

For example

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, there are many AI technologies for creating

art

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and many exhibitions of

art

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are opened worldwide but the number of visitors is small. Those

reasons

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are considered as the main factors that lead to

this

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instance.

On the other hand

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besides

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these above

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reasons

Add a comma

reasons,

show examples

we can consider solutions for

this

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situation. In my opinion, the main solution that can encourage society to believe in

art

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again

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

would be teaching them compulsory courses in schools. By investigating children, the next generation will be connected to

art

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and notice its true value.

Moreover

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, allocating some budget by the government to advertising arts can be an effective idea to turn the community's interest back.

For instance

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, now, game shows not only focus on providing useful knowledge about

art

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, life and society

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

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inspire

people

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to pay more attention to

art

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. In conclusion, it is notable that most adolescents refuse to enter the

art

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industry because of the uncertainty in employment and the unstable income.

This

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problem can be dealt with by organizing jobs for artists and making connections between different fields.

hanie.english.eduWed Sep 18 2024

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task achievement

To achieve a higher score, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that is fully developed. Some points are not fully expanded.

coherence cohesion

You can improve coherence and cohesion by making smoother transitions between your ideas and paragraphs. Linking words and phrases can help with this.

task achievement

Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points. This would make your arguments stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Conclude your essay with a summary of the main points discussed. This would enhance the structure and completeness of your response.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which sets the stage and wraps up the discussion effectively.

task achievement

You have presented both reasons for the decline in interest in art and potential solutions to the issue, which shows a balanced approach.

overall

The language used is clear and free from major grammatical errors, making the essay easy to read and understand.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Technological advancement
Economic growth
STEM subjects
Job security
Financial success
Pragmatic
Utilitarian pursuits
Art education
Inclusive
Engaging
Contemporary society
Social issues
Environmental themes
Digital platforms
Virtual museums
Interactive art

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Art is considered an essential part of all cultures throughout the world. However, these days fewer and fewer people appreciate art and turn their focus to science, technology and business.Why do you think that is? What could be done to encourage more people to take interest in the arts.

Your opinion

People are using a lot of online language translation apps. Do the benefits of this outweigh the disadvantages?

All cars that burn fossil fuels should be banned and electric cars should replace them. Do you agree or disagree?

In some places old age is valued, while other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Are you someone who likes change? In your opinion, what are the pros and cons of big changes in life?