The pie chart illustrate the percentage of emploition staff aged in the public sector in United Kingdom in years 2015 and 2020.

#percentage #emploition #staff #sector #kingdom #years

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The pie chart

illustrate

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illustrates

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the percentage of

emploition

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exploration

exploitation

staff

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aged in the public sector in

United

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the United

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Kingdom in

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years

Correct article usage

the years

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2015 and 2020.

Overall

Linking Words

, the highest ratio in the pie chart is between 21 and 30

years

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old in 2020, whilst the lawless percentage of

employment

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employed

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staff

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was from 31 to 40 in

year

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the year

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2020, in 2015

staff

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aged 21 to 30 and over 50

remained

Verb problem

maintained

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the same proportion. In

details

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detail

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, people under 21

years

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old were the

littest

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most lit

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ratio in 2015 with 14 per cent but in 2020 it dropped to 12%,

while

Linking Words

age 21 to 30

staff

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was 23% in 2015, after that it raised 10% more in 2020 and stuff from age 31 to 40 had a

harriedly

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hurriedly

harried

decreased they was 21% and became 11%. The remaining two categories are people aged 41 to 50 and over 50, employed

staff

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aged between 41 and 50 they had increased

with

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about 9% between the two

years

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in contrast

Linking Words

, people over 50

years

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had dropped from 23

percent

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per cent

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to 16 per cent with approximately 7% gap in 2020.

Submitted by zakiahanafy1 on Sat Sep 21 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words staff, years with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrate" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

178 words

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The pie chart illustrate the percentage of emploition staff aged in the public sector in United Kingdom in years 2015 and 2020.

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, it creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

When researching people's personalities and abilities, scientists debate the role that their biological genes play compared to the impact of their environment, including their experiences as they grow up. Which do you think is a more powerful influence– genetics or environment? Why?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Most adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50persent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extend do you agree?