IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the UK in 1995 and 1999

The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the UK in 1995 and 1999
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According to
Linking Words
 the diagrams we can see that the older the age of
people
Use synonyms
, the increasing numbers of hours the
people
Use synonyms
 spending the
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
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 in watching the TV. But, the
middle aged
Add a hyphen
middle-aged
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 groups ''35 to 44'' and ''45 to 54'' spent hours
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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reduced a bit if
people
Use synonyms
 compared them with the aged group next to them.
Also
Linking Words
, except
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 youngest and oldest groups of
people
Use synonyms
 aged in the range ''4 to 15'' and ''65 and the above'', there is a
tend
Replace the word
tendency
show examples
 to increase the watching TV times by year too.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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