The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the UK in 1995 and 1999

The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the The diagram below shows time spent watching TV by age and gender in the UK in 1995 and 1999
According to
the diagrams we can see that the older the age of
people
, the increasing numbers of hours the
people
spending the
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
in watching the TV. But, the
middle aged
Add a hyphen
middle-aged
show examples
groups ''35 to 44'' and ''45 to 54'' spent hours
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
reduced a bit if
people
compared them with the aged group next to them.
Also
, except
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
youngest and oldest groups of
people
aged in the range ''4 to 15'' and ''65 and the above'', there is a
tend
Replace the word
tendency
show examples
to increase the watching TV times by year too.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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