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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The diagram illustrates the proportions of students in Britain who have the ability to speak other languages in addition to English from 2000 to 2010.

The diagram illustrates the proportions of students in Britain who have the ability to speak other languages in addition to English from 2000 to 2010.
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The above two pie charts demonstrate the percentages of students who
capable
Add a missing verb
are capable
show examples
to speak
Change preposition
of speaking
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 different languages
in addition
Linking Words
 to English in Britain in two different years 2000 and 2010. 
Overall
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, the most significant feature is the proportion of the students that
unable
Add a missing verb
are unable
show examples
 to speak other languages occupied the largest amount in both years .
It's
Unnecessary verb
It
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 was 30% in 2000 and
then
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start
Wrong verb form
started
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 to
increased
Change the verb
increase
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 gradually to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
35% in 2010. The percentage of classmates
how
Correct word choice
who
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 are able to speak Germany only was similar in the two years which is 10% .
Moreover
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, the
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 of students
speak
Wrong verb form
speaking
show examples
 French only sharply
growth
Replace the word
grew
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to
Change preposition
from
show examples
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
10% in 2000 to 15% in 2010.
In contrast
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,
stuadents
Correct your spelling
students
 who capable
to speak
Change preposition
of speaking
show examples
 Spanish only
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 20%
then
Linking Words
 dipped to be 10% in 2010. Related to other languages exhibited
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
 increasing pattern.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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