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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the sector contributions to India’s gross domestic product from 1960 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Contribution as % of India's GDP

The bar chart below shows the sector contributions to India’s gross domestic product from 1960 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Contribution as % of India's GDP
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The graph illustrates the share of India’s gross domestic product (GDP) which was contributed by agriculture, industry, and services from 1960 to 2000. Over the forty-year period, the agriculture
sector
 provided a big contribution to India’s economy even though the share of the GDP dropped steadily year by year.
On the other hand
,
services
Correct article usage
the services
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sector
 rose constantly during four decades.
Furthermore
,
industrial
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the industrial
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sector
 was unchanged significantly during the whole period. In 1960, the agriculture
sector
 contributed the highest
percentage
 to India’s GDP which was recorded at 62%.
However
, the
percentage
 dropped constantly until reaching the lowest
percentage
 at 15% in 2000. In 1960, services became the second-highest contributor to
Indian
Correct article usage
the Indian
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 economy at 18% and it grew steadily to approximately 25% in 1980. In that year, it jumped significantly to 63% in 2000, becoming the highest contribution in the period.
Industrial
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The industrial
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sector
,
on the other hand
, remained unchanged. The contribution of
industrial
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the industrial
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sector
 grew only between 1960 and 1980, from 15% to 24%.
However
, the
percentage
 plateaued from 1980 onwards at 25%.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, on the other hand".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sector, percentage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "unchanged" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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