In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

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In the 21st century, a growing number of nations face a situation where their citizens must travel away from
friends
Use synonyms
and family to find employment.
While
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there are certain drawbacks, I believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. I will clarify my statements with relevant arguments in the following paragraphs. 
To begin
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with, migrating to another place for work offers several advantages. There are often numerous opportunities waiting for those who relocate. The challenging environment will
also
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significantly develop
workers
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workers'
worker's
show examples
skills. These developed skills can lead to promotions and higher income in the workplace.
Additionally
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, people may feel freer to work when they are not burdened by family pressures.
For instance
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, a recent study in India revealed that many teenagers engage in risky behaviour
due to
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peer influence.
Therefore
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, moving away from
friends
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and family to work can help avoid
such
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situations. 
On the other hand
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, living away from family has numerous downsides. If a person lives away from their parents, they may not receive help or care if they become ill.
Furthermore
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, human beings often experience loneliness and depression, and in
such
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cases, they need
friends
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to stay motivated and strong. These challenging situations can lead to mental illness, which can result in depression and anxiety in the future.
For example
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, the suicide rate in China and Japan is increasing at an alarming rate
due to
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high stress and anxiety among citizens.  In conclusion,
while
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there is an undeniable drawback to
peoples
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people's
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mental health if they move away from
friends
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and family to find a career, the advantages of higher income and developed skills are significant enough to outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by cranjal07 on

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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence by using more linking devices to connect ideas smoothly between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the writer's perspective and provides a roadmap for the essay.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the essay, reiterating the main points and the overall opinion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocation
  • employment prospects
  • professional development
  • cultural exposure
  • isolation
  • familial relationships
  • cost of living
  • career progression
  • mental health
  • significant life events
  • higher salaries
  • support families
  • broaden horizons
  • living standards
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