These days, people work in more than one job , and often change careers several times during their life. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this ?
In today’s society, it is common for
people
who have several job
Change to a plural noun
jobs
in
Change preposition
at
one
time. They also
switching
their Change the form of the verb
switch
career
in
many times during their life. I stand with those who believe that having more than Change preposition
apply
one
job
and changing career
swiftly might offer many drawbacks. Fix the agreement mistake
careers
Whereas
, this
essay will discuss both of
perspectives.
On the Change preposition
apply
one
hand, working in more than one
job
and switch in
a few times should be a positive development because Wrong verb form
switching
people
can earn more money through their different salary sources. As a result
, they can have a
better Correct article usage
apply
financial
to provide Replace the word
finances
their
needs.
Change preposition
for their
On the other hand
, in terms of having a job
, there are many obstacles that may impact when people
have more than one
job
. Firstly
, they could provide a lack of focus during a
working time because of the multitasking activity. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, people
who have a lot of job
could experience exhaustion Change to a plural noun
jobs
at the end
of the day, so they cannot concentrate to do their work properly. Secondly
, because of release more energy to do more than one
job
, it could affect their health problems.
Moreover
, fast-changing
Correct article usage
a fast-changing
career
can make some people
cannot mastering
a skill. To explain, being an expert in Wrong verb form
master
one
thing, people
must have a full concern into
it, so they can have a well-developed skill. As we can see Change preposition
for
that
in today’s work Correct pronoun usage
apply
requirement
, many Fix the agreement mistake
requirements
company
are hired an employee based on how long and good they Change to a plural noun
companies
are having
Wrong verb form
have
a
work experience.
Correct article usage
apply
To sum up
, however
having a few careers and changing them frequently have some benefits, the drawbacks in this
issue is
outweigh the benefits. I believe that when we can choose our Unnecessary verb
apply
career
wisely from an early stage, it would
be good for our Wrong verb form
will
life
in Fix the agreement mistake
lives
a
Correct article usage
the
long-term
.Correct your spelling
long term
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Work on structuring your paragraphs more clearly. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and logically develops one main idea.
task achievement
Try to use more specific examples to support your main points. This will make your arguments more convincing and help clarify your ideas.
language use
Aim to improve the variety of your vocabulary and use more advanced language structures. This will help you clearly express your complex ideas.
task achievement
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of having multiple jobs and changing careers, which aligns well with the task response requirements.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion that frames the discussion well, providing a comprehensive view of the issue.
task achievement
The main idea is relevant and well-chosen as it addresses a common trend in modern society.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.