Computers and modems have made it possible for office workers to do much of their works from home instead of working in offices every day. Working from home should be encouraged as it is good for workers and employees. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays, most companies give their employees
option
Correct article usage
the option
show examples
to choose their workplace, they can
work
from
home
using technology or go to offices where everybody
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
together. Some
people
believe that
home
Correct article usage
the home
show examples
office system should be more common among employers.
This
essay completely disagrees with the statement. There are two vital
effecte
Correct your spelling
effect
effects
which can affect
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
business lives negatively. To commence, one main demerit is the lack of
communicate
Replace the word
communication
show examples
between workers, the team members will not be allowed to communicate with each
others
Change to a singular noun
other
show examples
to help or learn from each other's mistakes,
moreover
, company productivity will decrease because of
this
distance, when the team
work
together they share ideas, problems and solutions and there are many challenges they can face it together.
For example
,
people
who
work
in the office can collaborate with their friends and improve their ideas by discussing their opinions.
As a result
,
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
at
company
Correct article usage
a company
show examples
is more helpful for the workers.
In addition
,
work
from
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
system can
increases
Change the verb form
increase
show examples
the number of lazy
people
in the community, they can get used to
work
Change the verb form
working
show examples
from bed
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
, they
also
might wear pyjamas
while
they are working, which is not matches the
work
's requirements,
lastly
Add a comma
lastly,
show examples
they will
missing
Wrong verb form
miss
show examples
some movement in their day and will get used to setting
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
.
For instance
,
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from
home
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
the person
setting
Verb problem
sit
show examples
in
chair
Add an article
a chair
the chair
show examples
for at least 8 hours a day and his body will get tired.
As a result
,
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from
home
causes health issues. In conclusion, development technology gives
people
many options in life, one of them being able to
work
without going to
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
this
option
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is easier in life but can
effect
Verb problem
apply
show examples
negatively on
people
's communication and health.
Submitted by danall1kat on

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Vocabulary & Sentence Structure
Your essay lacks a diverse range of vocabulary and sentence structures. Try to use a more varied and complex vocabulary to articulate your points more effectively.
Grammar
There are a few grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and incorrect verb forms. Review these errors and consider practicing grammar more to improve in this area.
Content Development
The essay presents two main points, but they could be elaborated on with more depth and specific examples.
Structure
The essay effectively presents a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the arguments properly.
Position Consistency
You clearly express your disagreement with the statement and maintain your position throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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