The line graph shows how much money overseas visitors spent in the UK from 1980 - 2010 and the pie charts show the reasons for their visits in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The line graph shows how much money overseas visitors spent in the UK from 1980 - 2010 and the pie charts show the reasons for their visits in 1980 and 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.
Both
line
Correct article usage
the line
show examples
graph and pie chart illustrate information regarding how much money
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
spent by
visitors
and why in the UK from 1980 to 2010. In regard to expenses
paied
Correct your spelling
paid
by
visitors
,
people
spent almost 8000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in 1980,
then
it slightly
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
in 1983 to reach its lowest with approximately 7000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. after
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
it
continue
Wrong verb form
continued
show examples
to grow
untill
Correct your spelling
until
it reached almost 9000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
spent in 1990. Following that, it had a small decline in the next two years which
return
Wrong verb form
returned
show examples
to less than 9000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
Then
it went up to reach its peak in 1997 with almost 12000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
spending by
visitors
. After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
it had a fluctuated years with ups and downs. Regarding the reasons why individuals were coming to the UK in these periods of time. In 1980,
people
came
Correct pronoun usage
who came
show examples
for holiday were 44 per cent
while
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
and visiting relatives
come
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
second and third with 20,7% and 18,7%.
Others
Correct quantifier usage
Other
show examples
reasons why
visitors
came to
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
were the least one in 1980 with 16.6 per cent.
However
, there was a chance in the
proprtion
Correct your spelling
production
of
thser
Correct your spelling
these
those
their
figures in 2010.
people
came
Correct pronoun usage
who came
show examples
for vacation
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased
while
people
Correct article usage
the people
show examples
who
come
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
for
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased. Visiting friends and relatives had a significant increase with almost 10
pwe cent
Correct your spelling
per cent
more in 2010.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, people, millions with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • line graph
  • steady increase
  • fluctuations
  • overseas visitors
  • significant rise
  • primary reasons
  • pie charts
  • holiday visits
  • business trips
  • visits to friends and relatives
  • expenditure
  • travel options
  • economic factors
  • tourism marketing strategies
  • global travel priorities
  • proportions
  • changing
  • correlate
  • reflect
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