IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The plans below show the layout of the ground floor of a museum in 1990 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The two plans show changes to the ground floor in 1990 and 2010. A lot changed during
this
Linking Words
 time.
For example
Linking Words
, in 1990, the statue was located in front of the stairs, but in
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
 in the centre of the hall.
Also
Linking Words
, new zones appeared,
such
Linking Words
 as a poster display area and the children’s interactive zone.
However
Linking Words
, the museum office, the natural history room, the local history room, and the gift shop remained in their places. The most striking alteration has been in the Archaeology gallery in 2010;
this
Linking Words
 area is not working. Another important change happened with the entrance, which almost doubled in size. The reception counter was moved a little bit forward. In 2010, an elevator appeared between the cafe, the gift shop, and the natural history room.
In addition
Linking Words
, in 2010, three rooms had no walls,
although
Linking Words
 in
1990
Punctuation problem
1990,
show examples
 there were doors. Taken as a whole, the museum’s ground floor changed much between 1990 and 2010,
such
Linking Words
 as rooms, statues and walls.

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task response
Add a clear overview in the first or second line. Say the main changes in one short way.
coherence and cohesion
Group changes by area, not by many small points one by one. This will make the report easier to follow.
task response
Compare more key features from both years, not only list changes. Show what stayed the same and what changed most.
coherence and cohesion
Use link words in a simple way, like 'while', 'in contrast', and 'meanwhile'.
task response
Be careful with unclear lines like 'this area is not working'. Say exactly what the plan shows.
coherence and cohesion
Your last line is too general. Write a stronger ending with the biggest changes.
task response
You mention both change and no change, which is good for this task.
task response
You give some clear examples, like the statue, the entrance, and the new elevator.
coherence and cohesion
The report has a simple beginning and ending, so the reader can follow it.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas come in a clear order from one part of the plan to another.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • layout
  • exhibition space
  • gallery rooms
  • visitor facilities
  • accessibility
  • redesign
  • expansion
  • administrative areas
  • staff-only areas
  • gift shop
  • entrance
  • lobby area
  • restrooms
  • cafes
  • improvements
  • access areas
  • ground floor
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