More and more people are working from home rather than at the workplace. Some people say this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but others think it will bring stress to the home. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #home #workplace #workers #families #stress

In the

last

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

an increase in the number of people working from

home

has been observed. Many individuals who take advantage of

this

claim that it is a great solution and a significant improvement.

However

, it is

also

often said that

such

an approach can contribute to bringing stress to the

home

. Each of these views has both pros and cons. The

home

office has many relevant benefits. First and foremost, it allows

Correct pronoun usage

us to

show examples

save time. If the employee did not have to waste hours in traffic jams driving between his house and a workplace, he would be able to spend it with his family,

consequently

strengthening the bonds within it.

Furthermore

such

an approach not only does allow to save time, but

also

money. To illustrate

this

, as long as you don't use your car, you don't have to pay for the fuel which may be a significant income to the budget.

On the other hand

, the

home

office can

also

possess many relevant drawbacks. The most significant of them is the fact that it may bring stress to the

home

. Work has always been a separate place which is different from family life,

therefore

, it should maintain its distinct function

otherwise

, all its negative aspects can penetrate the family causing anxiety.

In addition

, working from

home

can

also

contribute to the alienation of the employee. If you have to go to work you are forced to

make

Verb problem

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

interaction

Replace the word

interact

show examples

with other people which has a positive influence on your mental health but if you work from

home

you spend most of your day alone,

hence

, you are deprived of social interactions. In conclusion, in my

opiniony

Correct your spelling

opinion

, the disadvantages of working from

home

outweigh the advantages. Despite the fact that it allows employees to save time and money, it can bring stress to

home

and cause anxiety resulting from loneliness as well.

Submitted by kuba.glogowski on Tue Oct 15 2024

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task achievement

Try to include more specific examples to support the points made.

task achievement

Be mindful of minor grammatical issues to enhance clarity.

coherence cohesion

Ensure smooth transition between ideas and paragraphs for improved cohesion.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with a good introduction and conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Main points are generally well-supported and explained.

task achievement

Complete response to the task with a discussion of both views and a clear opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

314 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Telecommuting
Flexi-time
Remote work
Work-life integration
Virtual collaboration
Self-discipline
Workspace
Burnout
Ergonomics
Time management
Distractions
Productivity
Commuting
Connectivity issues
Team dynamics

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More and more people are working from home rather than at the workplace. Some people say this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, but others think it will bring stress to the home. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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