You need to borrow some money to pay for something you need for your work or studies. Write a letter to your bank to ask for a loan. In your letter introduce yourself and ask for a loan say why you need the money explain how you plan to pay the money back

#money #work #studies #bank #loan #plan

Dear manager, I am a young student planning to study abroad for my higher study for which I want to lend some money as

loan

Correct article usage

a loan

show examples

from your

bank

Actually

Add a comma

Actually,

show examples

I completed my studies in Government Sr. school in Kurali. And now I aspire to take the

Compter

Correct your spelling

Computer

show examples

system technician course in Canada. Having said that, I need some funds for my GIC account

however

I have already paid my college fee. Now I want to make a request to the

bank

for

allowing

Verb problem

apply

show examples

bank

student loan of INR 5,00,000 so that I can fulfill my dream of higher studies

oversea

Correct your spelling

overseas

show examples

. On

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

top of that, I will make sure I can pay the

lended

Correct your spelling

lent

show examples

money back on time or maybe before the given time as I will start working

part time

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

in foreign.

Moreover

, the college I applied to

provide

Wrong verb form

provides

show examples

paid practicum benefits that would help me to pay

extra

Add an article

an extra

show examples

amount on

timely

Add an article

a timely

show examples

basis.

Rephrase

Finally

show examples

last

, I want to say that it would be really great and helpful if

bank

Add an article

the bank

a bank

show examples

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

help me pursue my dream. I would be happy to help with any information or questions anytime. Regards Simran

Submitted by preetsimran0123 on Sun Oct 27 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Single Idea Per Paragraph

Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to improve clarity. The paragraph explaining the need for money could be split for more detail on college and GIC needs.

Complete Response

Provide more detail about your repayment plan, including specific sources of income and timelines for repayment to complete the task response.

Suitable Writing Tone

Formal and polite tone maintained throughout the letter.

Complete Response

The letter includes a clear request for a specific loan amount and purpose.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

191 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
You have a full-time job and you are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. Write a letter to your teachers. In your letter describe the situation explain why you cannot continue at this time say what action you would like to take You do NOT need to write any addresses.
I am writing this letter to inform you that at this moment I have a really hard situation related to my free time which I usually spend to studying for your course. It seems like I will not have an opportunity to continue improving my knowledge in the field of my current course at this time in the evening.
5
band
many governments think that economic progress is their most important goals.Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Economic progress is thought to be the most important goal for many domestic organs.Whereas, some other groups declare that other kind of approaches have equal importance for a country. I totally agree with the former idea.
5.5
band
Some people believe that studying online is more effective than studying on campus while others disagree. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of online learning. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
It is often argued that, few individuals think that web-based learning is more beneficial than apparently studying in institutions while others are opponents of this belief.In this essay, I will discuss both merits and demerits of online learning .
4.5
band
Some people believe that children should obey rules and listen to their parents and teachers; Some others believe that less control will help children deal with their adult life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While some people are of the opinion that children should obey their parents and teachers, others believe that would be useful giving their freedom by not taking so much control which will allow them to learn in solving their life problems. In my point of view, I am more inclined to believe that children are still in the stage that need olders assistance and directions but too strict rules may have and adverse influence on the problem solving abilities to children. This essay will break down the differences between these two point of view.
7
band
Some people say History is one of the most important schoool subjects. Othert people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technolog are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Whether nowadays should learn past or other subjects like science and automation is a debatable discussion point worth considering.

You need to borrow some money to pay for something you need for your work or studies. Write a letter to your bank to ask for a loan. In your letter introduce yourself and ask for a loan say why you need the money explain how you plan to pay the money back

many governments think that economic progress is their most important goals.Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that studying online is more effective than studying on campus while others disagree. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of online learning. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people believe that children should obey rules and listen to their parents and teachers; Some others believe that less control will help children deal with their adult life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say History is one of the most important schoool subjects. Othert people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technolog are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.