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In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #work #move #friends #families #development
There are some advantages and disadvantages of going abroad and moving away from friends and to their families to find jobs.
For instance
, abroad there are more chances to work in high-income companies,
however
, some people get homesick by leaving their home countries.
To begin
 with, there are positive impacts to finding jobs abroad. First of all, abroad there are more chances to find and join higher income companies or famous companies.
This
 means that they can earn more money and can get a better life than in their home countries.
Moreover
, they can learn other languages and different cultures.
Therefore
, it is helpful to communicate with others and when they go to different culture countries.
Additionally
, going abroad can improve personal development by living in different abroad that they have never been to
this
 is because they get confidence in going abroad alone and adapting to the new things abroad.
On the other hand
, there are some negative impacts too.
Secondly
, they can easily get culture shocks after they leave their own abroad.
This
 means that they might not concentrate on working and earn less than what they expected.
Additionally
, they can get stuck studying new languages.
This
 means that they can not contact or communicate with many people which will be useless in the company. They do not have the confidence to go abroad by themselves self and some people feel scared to go abroad.
Therefore
, it can have negative impacts
while
 working in the company.
To sum up
, there are some advantages and disadvantages of moving away from families and friends to find work.
Such
 as, it can improve different languages,
however
, humans get homesick.
Overall
, in my opinion, going abroad to find work is more advantages of
this
 development outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by dokmally2 on

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task achievement
Try to provide specific examples to support your main points. This would help strengthen your argument and show a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas in a more logical order. You might benefit from outlining your essay before writing to ensure that your points follow a coherent structure.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame the essay.
task achievement
You cover both advantages and disadvantages, giving a balanced view on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • relocation
  • employment prospects
  • professional development
  • cultural exposure
  • isolation
  • familial relationships
  • cost of living
  • career progression
  • mental health
  • significant life events
  • higher salaries
  • support families
  • broaden horizons
  • living standards
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