Nowadaya both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. this was not so in past. what may be the root cause of this behaviour? discuss the reasons and possible results.

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In recent years, an increasing number of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
have allocated considerable
Use synonyms
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to
beauty
Use synonyms
services. The main cause of
this
Linking Words
phenomenon is
Correct article usage
the infulence
show examples
Correct article usage
the infulence
show examples
Correct your spelling
influence
infulence
Correct your spelling
influence
of social
media
Use synonyms
,
also
Linking Words
there are other reasons for it like frequent changes in
beauty
Use synonyms
trends . Some results of these behaviours are damaging
Use synonyms
body
Correct article usage
the body
show examples
due to
Linking Words
the
missuse
Correct your spelling
misuse
and
consistantly
Correct your spelling
consistently
constantly
changing their appearance. On the
one
Use synonyms
side,
one
Use synonyms
of the main causes is social
media
Use synonyms
and
adreticements
Correct your spelling
advertisements
persuading
people
Use synonyms
to
soend
Correct your spelling
spend money
mony
Use synonyms
for exerting
Change preposition
to exert
show examples
more
beauty
Use synonyms
cares
Fix the agreement mistake
care
show examples
and
buying
Wrong verb form
buy
show examples
more
baeuty
Correct your spelling
beauty
products.
Beauty
Use synonyms
salons and
produsts
Correct your spelling
products
have been
adverticed
Correct your spelling
advertised
widely on
socials
Change the noun form
social
show examples
media
Use synonyms
, where many
people
Use synonyms
have been exposed to them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, another reason is
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
and fashion changing
consistantly
Correct your spelling
consistently
constantly
and some individuals tend to
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
them. Celebrities and famous figures contribute to
this
Linking Words
trend alteration and those who are their fans tend to
followe
Correct your spelling
follow
their way and adopt their aesthetic features,
thus
Linking Words
,
spendig
Correct your spelling
spending
spend
a huge amount of
Use synonyms
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to be like them.
For example
Linking Words
, many teenagers who are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fans of BTS, which is
an
Change the article
a
show examples
K-poo
Correct your spelling
K-pop
show examples
band, tend to follow their skin
routin
Correct your spelling
routine
of them. On the other side,
one
Use synonyms
of the viable results is
detrimental
Correct article usage
the detrimental
show examples
affects
Replace the word
effects
show examples
of some products and
beauty
Use synonyms
services on
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
show examples
body
Use synonyms
. Certain injections bring about severe health problems for patients
such
Linking Words
as atrophy for those injecting Botaxes.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
due to
Linking Words
the
consistant
Correct your spelling
consistent
constant
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
in aesthetic standards, some individuals
spending
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
Use synonyms
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to change their aesthetic features by injecting fillers or
surguries
Correct your spelling
surgeries
and
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
allign
Correct your spelling
align
aligned
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the trends.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
who
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not
allign
Correct your spelling
align
aligned
with these standards are exposed to
body
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shaming.
For instance
Linking Words
, Iran is
one
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the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
countries in which
people
Use synonyms
do nose
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
because of the
internationals
Correct your spelling
international
show examples
trend of having smaller noses. In conclusion, the main cause of growth in expenditures associated
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
beauty
Use synonyms
care is social
media
Use synonyms
and
advertisments
Correct your spelling
advertisements
of
beauty
Use synonyms
products and
beauty
Use synonyms
salons,
additionaly
Correct your spelling
additionally
additional
, celebrities can affect trends and
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
tasts
Correct your spelling
tastes
tests
. These lead to health issues in some cases and frequently changing their features
due to
Linking Words
the
body
Use synonyms
sahame
Correct your spelling
shape
shame
.
Submitted by rezaei.rezvan94 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear response to the topic and discusses the reasons and results effectively. However, try to provide more structured arguments and ensure that each point is fully developed.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical flow, but sometimes the transitions between ideas can be unclear. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea that is developed and linked to the next.
task achievement
Your essay provides relevant and specific examples, such as the influence of social media and BTS fans. This strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly present, which helps frame your essay well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Societal pressure
  • Media influence
  • Unrealistic beauty standards
  • Technological advancements
  • Disposable income
  • Homogenous beauty ideal
  • Globalization
  • Cosmetic trends
  • Psychological impact
  • Self-esteem
  • Social status
  • Beauty care
  • Personal appearance
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