Nowadaya both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. this was not so in past. what may be the root cause of this behaviour? discuss the reasons and possible results.

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In recent years, an increasing number of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
have allocated considerable
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to
beauty
services. The main cause of
this
phenomenon is
Correct article usage
the infulence
show examples
Correct article usage
the infulence
show examples
Correct your spelling
influence
infulence
Correct your spelling
influence
of social
media
,
also
there are other reasons for it like frequent changes in
beauty
trends . Some results of these behaviours are damaging
body
Correct article usage
the body
show examples
due to
the
missuse
Correct your spelling
misuse
and
consistantly
Correct your spelling
consistently
constantly
changing their appearance. On the
one
side,
one
of the main causes is social
media
and
adreticements
Correct your spelling
advertisements
persuading
people
to
soend
Correct your spelling
spend money
mony
for exerting
Change preposition
to exert
show examples
more
beauty
cares
Fix the agreement mistake
care
show examples
and
buying
Wrong verb form
buy
show examples
more
baeuty
Correct your spelling
beauty
products.
Beauty
salons and
produsts
Correct your spelling
products
have been
adverticed
Correct your spelling
advertised
widely on
socials
Change the noun form
social
show examples
media
, where many
people
have been exposed to them.
Furthermore
, another reason is
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
and fashion changing
consistantly
Correct your spelling
consistently
constantly
and some individuals tend to
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
them. Celebrities and famous figures contribute to
this
trend alteration and those who are their fans tend to
followe
Correct your spelling
follow
their way and adopt their aesthetic features,
thus
,
spendig
Correct your spelling
spending
spend
a huge amount of
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to be like them.
For example
, many teenagers who are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fans of BTS, which is
an
Change the article
a
show examples
K-poo
Correct your spelling
K-pop
show examples
band, tend to follow their skin
routin
Correct your spelling
routine
of them. On the other side,
one
of the viable results is
detrimental
Correct article usage
the detrimental
show examples
affects
Replace the word
effects
show examples
of some products and
beauty
services on
individual's
Correct article usage
an individual's
show examples
body
. Certain injections bring about severe health problems for patients
such
as atrophy for those injecting Botaxes.
Moreover
,
due to
the
consistant
Correct your spelling
consistent
constant
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
in aesthetic standards, some individuals
spending
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
mony
Correct your spelling
money
to change their aesthetic features by injecting fillers or
surguries
Correct your spelling
surgeries
and
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
allign
Correct your spelling
align
aligned
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the trends.
Also
,
people
who
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not
allign
Correct your spelling
align
aligned
with these standards are exposed to
body
shaming.
For instance
, Iran is
one
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
countries in which
people
do nose
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
because of the
internationals
Correct your spelling
international
show examples
trend of having smaller noses. In conclusion, the main cause of growth in expenditures associated
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
beauty
care is social
media
and
advertisments
Correct your spelling
advertisements
of
beauty
products and
beauty
salons,
additionaly
Correct your spelling
additionally
additional
, celebrities can affect trends and
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
tasts
Correct your spelling
tastes
tests
. These lead to health issues in some cases and frequently changing their features
due to
the
body
sahame
Correct your spelling
shape
shame
.
Submitted by rezaei.rezvan94 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear response to the topic and discusses the reasons and results effectively. However, try to provide more structured arguments and ensure that each point is fully developed.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical flow, but sometimes the transitions between ideas can be unclear. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea that is developed and linked to the next.
task achievement
Your essay provides relevant and specific examples, such as the influence of social media and BTS fans. This strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly present, which helps frame your essay well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Societal pressure
  • Media influence
  • Unrealistic beauty standards
  • Technological advancements
  • Disposable income
  • Homogenous beauty ideal
  • Globalization
  • Cosmetic trends
  • Psychological impact
  • Self-esteem
  • Social status
  • Beauty care
  • Personal appearance
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