IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The chart below gives information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information on the percentage of British people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #british #people #money #charity #age #range #years #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar chart compared the five different
age
groups
 of
people
 who accessed the
internet
 on
daily
Correct article usage
a daily
show examples
 basis in the
UK
 between 2003 and 2006.
It is clear that
16
Correct article usage
the 16
show examples
-27
age
group
 in the
UK
 accounted for the highest points of the whole graph over the four-year period.
Also
, aged 25-44 and 55-64 saw the largest rises in
Internet
users
 over the same period. In 2003, the percentage of
people
 from 16-24
age
groups
 was exactly 80%, compared to precisely 50% of
people
 aged 25-44. The figures for the youngest
group
 and
aged
Correct pronoun usage
those aged
show examples
 25-44 saw only a small increase of a full 10%. In 2006,
people
 accessing the
internet
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
aged 16-24 were by far the highest in terms of
users
 in the
UK
, and the second one was the older
age
group
, 25- 44
age
group
. The proportion of
Internet
users
 gaining access from three other
age
groups
,45-54, 55-64, 65 and oversaw a relatively small rise in
users
 between 2003 and 2004 in the
UK
. In 2005, these
age
groups
 used exactly 50%, 40%, and approximately 15% respectively.
In2006
Correct your spelling
In 2006
, the figure for
aged
Correct pronoun usage
those aged
show examples
 45-54 reached nearly 55%,
while
 55-to 64-years-old
age
groups’
Change noun form
groups
show examples
users
 figures increased dramatically and the percentage of the oldest
age
group
 fluctuated slightly, 65-years-old and over.
Submitted by esaraica on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, groups, people, internet, uk, group, users with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rises" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • charitable donations
  • age range/bracket/group
  • percentage (%)
  • 20-year period
  • British people
  • trends
  • increase/decrease
  • significant change
  • donation patterns
  • remained stable
  • highest/lowest
  • observe
  • compare
  • summarize
  • comment on
  • relevant features
What to do next:
Look at other essays: