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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The three pie charts show the proportion of four kinds of vehicles used in the UK in 1996, 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The three pie charts show the proportion of four kinds of vehicles used in the UK in 1996, 1985 and 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph compares the proportion of four different
transportation
Use synonyms
 that people in the UK used over a
period
Use synonyms
 of 40
years
Use synonyms
.Private cars, public
transportation
Use synonyms
,recreational vehicles, and commercial vehicles were used by the UK's residents over the
period
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the pie chart, private cars were the most popular
transportation
Use synonyms
 among citizens. The second place was taken by public
transportation
Use synonyms
, except in 1985 when the portions of public
transportation
Use synonyms
 and lorries were at the same amount. Over the
period
Use synonyms
, the percentage of people that used their own car increased dramatically. At the beginning of the
period
Use synonyms
 it was used by 40% of residents , and it rose by around 10% every 20
years
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, public
transportation
Use synonyms
 was used at approximately the same portion at around 20 to 25%. Commuting with lorries
in contrast
Linking Words
 varied over the
period
Use synonyms
. In the first 20
years
Use synonyms
, it was used by 20% of people
while
Linking Words
 the number fell to around 10%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, recreational
transportation
Use synonyms
 was completely opposite. In the first 20
years
Use synonyms
 it was used by almost 15%,
while
Linking Words
 the portions changed at around 5% and 8% in 1985 and 2005 respectively.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words transportation, period, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion
  • Dominant
  • Fluctuations
  • Noticeable increase
  • Significantly decreased
  • Consistent rise
  • Continuous decline
  • Varied trends
  • Data illustrates
  • Common vehicle type
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