IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information on the percentage of British poeple giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information on the percentage of British poeple giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #british #poeple #money #charity #age #range #years #summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart above illustrates information on the percentage of British
people
Use synonyms
 who are donating their
money
Use synonyms
 to charity from various
age
Use synonyms
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 between the years 1990 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
people
Use synonyms
 from
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 range 18
until
Change preposition
to
show examples
 50
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 dominating in 1990.
However
Linking Words
, in 2010, the
age
Use synonyms
 group from 51 and 65 years above are the ones who are dominating.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1990, there were as
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
 as 15 per
cent
Use synonyms
 from
Use synonyms
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 group 18 to 25 who
donates
Wrong verb form
donated
show examples
 their
money
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
, the number significantly increased from other
age
Use synonyms
 groups, which was 26 to 35. Following that,
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 peak
around
Change preposition
of around
show examples
 42 per
cent
Use synonyms
. After that, the total of
donation
Fix the agreement mistake
donations
show examples
continuosly
Correct your spelling
continuously
 decreased
along with
Linking Words
 older
people
Use synonyms
, respectively 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
 and 32 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in 2010,
people
Use synonyms
 who
categorized
Add a missing verb
were categorized
show examples
 as young generations, especially
from
Correct pronoun usage
those from
show examples
 18 until 25,
giving
Wrong verb form
gave
show examples
 their
money
Use synonyms
 only about 6 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, adults are donating more
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 24 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Subsequently
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 between
ages
Correct article usage
the ages
show examples
36
Change preposition
of 36
show examples
 and 65 are constantly upwards to give their
money
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 charity. Afterwards, the number lower to 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
 following
older
Correct article usage
the older
show examples
 generation.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, money, age, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: