Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organizing group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time

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Some believe parents should motivate their

children

Use synonyms

to be a part of group activity during free

time

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

others are of the idea of letting

children

Use synonyms

be on their own.

Although

Linking Words

being alone gives

children

Use synonyms

the

time

Use synonyms

to work on their hobbies and

encourage

Correct subject-verb agreement

encourages

show examples

them to be self-sufficient, I believe

involving

Replace the word

that involvement

show examples

in team

acts

Replace the word

activities

show examples

can teach

kids

Use synonyms

to be great team players and later help them become good members of society. First and foremost, it is important for

children

Use synonyms

to spend

own

Correct pronoun usage

their own

show examples

so that they can work on their hobbies.

That is

Linking Words

to see,

children

Use synonyms

develop certain creative hobbies

Change preposition

show examples

their

Change the word

show examples

early

ages

Fix the agreement mistake

age

show examples

, which

helped

Wrong verb form

help

show examples

them become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

expert

Fix the agreement mistake

experts

show examples

and and earn respect in society by using these skills for their

benefits

Fix the agreement mistake

benefit

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, the famous music singer Adele

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

told

Verb problem

said

show examples

in her interview that she used to practice singing

song

Fix the agreement mistake

songs

show examples

during

Change preposition

apply

show examples

her

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

during her childhood which developed her interest in

this

Linking Words

career.

Moreover

Linking Words

, self-sufficiency is another benefit of

someone on one

Replace the word

one-on-one

show examples

time

Use synonyms

for

children

Use synonyms

as the developers of maturity and a soulful bond with their own company.

Change preposition

show examples

contrast, parents should convince

children

Use synonyms

to participate in activities,

organ

Correct your spelling

organised

show examples

by their peers to teach them the value of being a team player. Being in a thing motivates

kids

Use synonyms

to absorb and understand how their peers act and how to achieve a goal by taking support from their fellow teammates.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, early childhood involvement in

such

Linking Words

activities

become

Correct subject-verb agreement

becomes

show examples

crucial for their

overall

Linking Words

development as the prestige member of society.

For instance

Linking Words

, in Vietnam, parents or play

date

Fix the agreement mistake

dates

show examples

for their

kids

Use synonyms

, where they give them one task to achieve, and

at the end

Linking Words

of the task, reward them with their favourite treats. In conclusion, promoting alone

time

Use synonyms

is a good way of ensuring

growth

Add an article

the growth

show examples

of the

kids

Use synonyms

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

show examples

I believe keeping them accompanied by their fellows has more significance.

Submitted by arvindpreet5040 on Tue Nov 19 2024

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task achievement

Enhance the essay by providing more specific examples to strengthen main points, particularly those supporting group activities' benefits.

coherence cohesion

Consider improving the logical flow between ideas, as some transitions may appear abrupt.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.

task achievement

Ideas are generally clear and expressed in a comprehensive manner, especially when discussing the benefits of group activities.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
occupied
organized
group activities
benefits
social
teamwork skills
interpersonal skills
friendship
discipline
time management
interests
hobbies
independent play
creativity
problem-solving skills
self-reliance
explore
discover

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Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organizing group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

An organization has given an advertisement for a part-time job for local children. Write a letter to the administrator of the organization. In your letter Introduce yourself Why you think you are suitable for the job State when you will be able to join that job

Some people feel that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building the live in. What are the reason for this? How can people research this?