You work for an international company. You have seen a advertisement for a training course which will be useful for your job. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter •Describe the training course you want to do •Explain what the company could do to help you •Say how the course will be useful to your job

#work #company #advertisement #course #job #manager #•describe #•explain #•say

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Dear Mr Saeidi , Hope

this

letter

find

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finds

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you

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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doing well,I am writing to request you to

make

Verb problem

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regestration

Correct your spelling

registration

to attend a workshop for my career and our holding as well,

To begin

,the first and formest ,I have been an

Correct your spelling

advertisment

Correct your spelling

about

Change preposition

for

show examples

this

training

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daily

Correct article usage

a daily

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newspaper which

called

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is called

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"sales marketing",

this

course

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being held by

Sattari

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the Sattari

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company Which is settled in Tehran ,I find it more

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convenient

conveninet

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convenient

and

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comfortable

comfortabel

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comfortable

for me because it's online coaching ,

this

is 7 days course and starting

form

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from

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25 November and the timing

are

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between 8:00 a.m to 10:00 a.m I would be grateful if the company

support

Wrong verb form

supported

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to take

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in taking

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this

oppourtunity

Correct your spelling

opportunity

,since the course

fess

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fees

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are

high

Rephrase

extremely high

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extremly

Correct your spelling

extremely

,it would be

aid

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an aid

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for me if the organization

pay

Wrong verb form

paid

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50 per cent of the fees ,

moreover

, I need an hour off for those two hours .

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From

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my perspective,

this

training

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is essentional

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essentional

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essential

for me and my company,in more

details

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detail

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it'n

Correct your spelling

it's

not cause to increase sell more

product

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products

show examples

it's help

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it helps

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to expert

product

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products

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to the other

countires

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countries

in all over the world .

as a result

,we can touch with a number of customers and able to get more profit. I look forward to hearing from you , Best Regards , Pardis Ghobadi

Submitted by pardisghobadi on Wed Nov 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure all paragraphs focus on a single idea to improve clarity. Consider restructuring the second paragraph to clearly introduce and explain each aspect of your request.

task achievement

Include more specific details about how the company and your role will benefit from the course, to fully meet the task achievement requirement.

greeting and closing

The letter addresses the manager directly and politely, with a clear greeting and closing.

task achievement

The purpose of the letter is clear, and the writer provides key details about the training course including the provider, format, dates, and timing.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

203 words

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