Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to secure a good job. Others believe that employers value work experience more than a university degree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some people think the best way to secure a good
job
is by getting a
degree
from
university
. In another perspective,
work
experience
is more valued rather than a
university
degree
. To secure a good
job
,
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
degree
and
work
experience
are very important. Getting a
degree
from
university
Add an article
a university
show examples
is very important to securing a good
job
. Having a
degree
means, we are
officialy
Correct your spelling
officially
stated that
mastering
Wrong verb form
master
show examples
something by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
theory or practical and because of that reason
university
degree
viewed
Add a missing verb
is viewed
show examples
one
Change preposition
as one
show examples
of
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
legitimate
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
job
seeking. Nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
job
vacancy requirements always
stated
Wrong verb form
state
show examples
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the minimum level of
degree
for candidates to apply. Having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
experience
is
also
the most considerate
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
show examples
for employers on selecting
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
candidate
. Experiencing on working means, the
candidate
already
understand
Change the verb form
understands
show examples
the pace and situation of the
job
. By the time the employee
facing
Wrong verb form
faces
show examples
something on working their
jobdesk
Correct your spelling
job desk
,
experience
Add an article
the experience
show examples
would help a lot for them because they already understand the problem and how
overcome
Add the particle
to overcome
show examples
it. In my opinion, getting a
degree
from
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
and having
work
experience
are the best and
legitimate
Correct quantifier usage
most legitimate
show examples
things for
candidate
Add an article
a candidate
the candidate
show examples
on securing
Change preposition
to secure
show examples
a good
job
. If the
candidate
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
combination
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
of these two things, it would be a great strength for them
on applying
Change preposition
to apply
show examples
and
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
more valued by the employers.
Submitted by arjoensyahananta168 on

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relevant specific examples
Work on integrating examples that clearly illustrate your point, such as successful professionals who benefited from both education and experience.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify your ideas further by expanding on why each element (degree and work experience) is important and how they complement each other.
introduction conclusion present
You successfully introduce both views and provide your opinion effectively in your essay.
logical structure
The basic structure of your essay is logical, with paragraphs dedicated to each viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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