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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruits and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008.

The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruits and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008.
#percentage #people #five #portions #fruits #vegetables #uk
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The given chart illustrates the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of people
ate
Correct pronoun usage
who ate
show examples
 fruits and vegetables per day in the UK between 2001 and 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clearly seen that children, men and women experienced an upward trend over the next 7 years. In detail, the percentage of women
ate
Correct pronoun usage
who ate
show examples
 fruits and vegetables
23
Add a missing verb
was 23
show examples
% in 2001, and increased gradually to 30% in 2005.The figure rich to 35% which was the highest percentage in
this
Linking Words
 chart.
Then
Linking Words
 the proportion decreased slightly to 2008 in the final year.In
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of men, started at 17%, and maintained over the next 3 years.After that, the figure climbed significantly to 27% from 2003 to 2006, and
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 merely to 26% in 2008. Turning to the figure for children started at 13%, and maintained the same level between 2001 and 2003.
Afterward
Change the spelling
Afterwards
show examples
, the proportion
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 dramatically to 26% in 2007
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and dropped
markly
Correct your spelling
markedly
 to 24% in 2008.
Submitted by yskim3064 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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