IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cemen-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building puroses. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The
illustraion
Correct your spelling
illustration
 depicts the various
stage
Fix the agreement mistake
stages
show examples
 involved in producing
cement
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
 how concrete is made by combining some materials. The process begins with
crushing
Correct article usage
the crushing
show examples
 of limestone and clay, the primary
inputsfor
Correct your spelling
inputs for
 manufacturing
cement
Use synonyms
.
Second,
Linking Words
in a mixer, the powdered minerals are mixed together;
then
Linking Words
 the mixture is heated in a rotating container in order to have a dried powder.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, the output of the previous step is
grinded
Correct your spelling
ground
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 by a grinder and turned
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cement
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
,
cements
Change the wording
cement
types of cement
blocks of cement
show examples
 is packed into the bags and
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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ready for use. Turning our attention to the process of concrete production, it is made up of four different ingredients with specific proportions. The gravel's share is half of the concrete, and the sand percentage is 25.
Moreover
Linking Words
, 15
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
cement
Use synonyms
 and 10
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of water is put into a concrete mixture. The mechanized mixture spines and combines all materials together to produce concrete.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words cement with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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