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Band 3.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012
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This
Linking Words
 line chart demonstrates the percentage of
Exports
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 in
Australia
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 with US, Japan,
China
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 and India over 22
years
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Overall
Linking Words
,
china
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 seems to be the most exported country with
Australia
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,
however
Linking Words
, US has The least
exports
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 are from
Australia
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 compared to India and Japan. In the beginning, the percentage of Australian
Exports
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 was steady over 5
years
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 from 1990 until 1995.
Then
Linking Words
, the number of
exports
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 increased dramatically from 2000 to 2012.
However
Linking Words
, US
exports
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 fluctuated rising and declining from 1995 till 2010.
while
Linking Words
China
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 was the highest of the four countries in the early 90s, after that, a decline in the number started around 4
years
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 from 1991 In conclusion,
China
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 was the main country exported from
Australia
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 from 2009 until 2012,
the
Change preposition
with the
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 other 3 countries varying in exporting over the
years
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words exports, australia, china, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • export
  • trend
  • time period
  • individually
  • comparison
  • significant changes
  • notable anomalies
  • influenced
  • increase
  • decrease
  • fluctuation
  • steady
  • sharp rise
  • sharp decline
  • stagnation
  • data
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