IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line graph below shows the fast food consumption in various regions around the world from 1980 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows the fast food consumption in various regions around the world from 1980 to 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given line graph illustrates
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
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 of fast food by Australian teenagers between 1980 and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
,it is clearly seen that the number of pizza and
hambergers
Correct your spelling
hamburgers
 experienced an upward trend,
while
Linking Words
 fish and chips experienced a downward trend. In detail, the number of
pizza
Fix the agreement mistake
pizzas
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 started at 5, and increased gradually to 30.The figure climbed significantly to 55
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and maintained the same level over the next 5 years.In
case
Correct article usage
the case
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 of
hambergers
Correct your spelling
hamburgers
 started at 10, and
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
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 steeply to 85.
Then
Linking Words
, the proportion
go
Change the verb form
goes
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 up steadily to 100 in the final year. Turning to the figure for fish and chips started at 100, and decreased slightly to 85.After that, the proportion escalated merely to 95 in 1980.
Change the spelling
Afterwards
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Afterward
Add a comma
Afterward,
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 the figure dropped dramatically to 40 from 1985 to 2000.
Submitted by yskim3064 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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