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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph below shows in the youth unemployment rate from 2000 and 2012.

The line graph below shows in the youth unemployment rate from 2000 and 2012.
#line #youth #unemployment #rate
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The diagram illustrates data about the index of young people in the field of
unemployment
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 over a 12-year period from 2000 to 2012 in five European
countries
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.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 all European
countries
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 experienced an increase from under to above in
2012except
Correct your spelling
2012 except
German
Change preposition
for German
show examples
 teenagers.
Additionally
Linking Words
, all figures witnessed some fluctuations at
beginning
Correct article usage
the beginning
show examples
 and end of the period. In detail,
rate
Correct article usage
the rate
show examples
 of
unemployment
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 in Sweden and France stood at 20% and 11%respectively in the initial year. Sweden's figure slightly increased to 20% in 2011, after rising twofold
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the trend for youth in France decreased by 3% in 2001 before moderately climbing to 25% in 2012. The figures for
unemployment
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 in
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 remaining
countries
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 Italy, Britain and Germany—were as follows: Both Italy and Britain were 10% and just under 30% in 2001,
while
Linking Words
 youth
unemployment
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 rates crashed in 2007 in both
countries
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 before increasing to about 35% and just above 20% respectively.
However
Linking Words
, Germany's youth
unemployment
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 demonstrated the lowest percentage at about 10% before rising to 15% in 2005.
Also
Linking Words
, the figure decreased by 1% in 2006 to just over 10% in 2012.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words unemployment, countries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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