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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line graph shows the birth rate, population growth rate and death rate from 1940 until 2020 in Scotland. The three different variables are measured in percentages

The line graph shows the birth rate, population growth rate and death rate from 1940 until 2020 in Scotland. The three different variables are measured in percentages
#line #birth #rate #population #growth #death #scotland #three #variables #percentages
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The line chart illustrates the birth proportion in Scotland, growth and death rates between 1940
until
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 2020.
Overall
, it's clear to say that
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
show examples
 percentage
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased in that period.
Therefore
,
human's
Change noun form
human
show examples
 growth and death
percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
percentages
show examples
 have
also
 dropped .
According to
 what it
shwon
Correct your spelling
showed
,
birth
Correct article usage
the birth
show examples
 rate's value in 1940
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was below 2,5% slightly and in 1945 it reached nearly 1,9%,
then
 it started to
eleveate
Correct your spelling
elevate
respectivly
Correct your spelling
respectively
 until 1950.
However
, it dropped strongly until 2020
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 it reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
approximately 0,5%. In terms of growth number in 1940 it was 0,8%, after that in 1945 it was elevating until 1955.
in
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
 it
deacresed
Correct your spelling
decreased
 to 0% in the early 20s.
On the other hand
,
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
 rate's number was almost under 1,5% in 1940 but
then
 it decreased gradually until 1959
then
 it remained fluctuated until 2010
where
Correct word choice
when
show examples
 it started to grow
rapiedlly
Correct your spelling
rapidly
 until 2020.
Submitted by omaralshrf2 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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