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Band 5.5

The bar chart illustrates the amount of wheat, barley, rice, and other grains harvested, measured in million tonnes, in India, the USA, and China in 2001.

The bar chart illustrates the amount of wheat, barley, rice, and other grains harvested, measured in million tonnes, in India, the USA, and China in 2001.
#bar #amount #wheat #barley #rice #grains #million #tonnes #india #usa #china
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The chart below shows the yield of wheat, barley, rice, and other grains grown in three countries
Linking Words
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
as
USA
Use synonyms
,
CHINA
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 and
INDIA
Use synonyms
 in 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 the score figures in the
USA
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 and
CHINA
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 were the same,in
India
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 the scores were much smaller.
To begin
Linking Words
 with
whereas
Linking Words
 in 2001,the smallest index was the same in three countries it was wheat,in the
USA
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 it was just over 3
million
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tons
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 and in
India
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, it was twice smaller about 1
million
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tons
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,in
China
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 the wheat harvest number was just over 2
million
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tons
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. The number of barley in the
USA
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 was exactly 7
tons
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,in
Use synonyms
China
Add a comma
China,
show examples
 it was 1
million
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tons
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 less and in
India
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, it was the least of all just under 2
million
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. The yield of the rice in the three countries was different,in the
USA
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 it was exactly 5
million
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 hectares,in
China
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 it was more than 1
million
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 and in
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India
Add a comma
India,
show examples
 it was as always, the least of all exactly 1
million
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 hectares. And the
last
Linking Words
 figure was other grains.
While
Linking Words
 in the
USA
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 and in
China
Use synonyms
 the score was the same 9
million
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 hectares,in
India
Use synonyms
 it was just over 1
million
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words usa, china, india, million, tons with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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