IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You recently visited a new restaurant in your neighborhood, but you were not satisfied with the service. Write a letter to the restaurant manager. In your letter: Describe the situation that led to your dissatisfaction. Explain how you felt about the service you received. Suggest what you would like the restaurant to do to improve their service.

#restaurant #neighborhood #service #manager #situation #dissatisfaction
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Dear Mr Robinson, I decided to write
this
 letter via email to complain about the inappropriate services and unacceptable quality of food that my family and I experienced at your restaurant
last
 night. As you know, I am one of your restaurant's oldest customers and,
in addition
, one of the most familiar people to your management and responsible personality. Because of that, I expected your services to be irregular and disorderly
overall
.
However
, as a long-time customer and a close friend, honestly, the quality of the food and dessert absolutely was not acceptable.
In addition
, the dishes, table covers, floors, and many other things were dirty and unbelievably disgusting. In any case, I hope nothing bad happened to you and your family.
Nevertheless
, I hope that despite your capability, everything is back to its original condition and that your restaurant's reputation always runs smoothly. Thank you for your reconsideration in advance. Best wishes M. Nikson
Submitted by MASOUDREIHANI1964 on

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task achievement
Clarify the relationship with the restaurant by mentioning your positive past experiences instead of stating you expected the services to be 'irregular and disorderly overall'.
coherence cohesion
Consider breaking down the letter into separate paragraphs for clarity, such as distinguishing between the issues with the service and your suggestions for improvement.
task achievement
The letter provides a clear description of the dissatisfaction with the dining experience.
coherence cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriate for a formal letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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