IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagrams below show the site of school in 2004 and the plan for change to the school site in 2024 Summaries the information by selsting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The diagrams below show the site of school in 2004 and the plan for change to the school site in 2024 Summaries the information by selsting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#diagrams #show #site #school #plan #change #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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This
 report revealed
tow
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 diagrams for an old
school
.
On
Correct your spelling
One
show examples
 of the diagrams is from 2004 and the other one is the intentional changes in the building
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2024 to be able to
content
Replace the word
contain
show examples
 1000
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
instead
 of 600. By looking
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
f
Correct your spelling
first
tow
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 images will notice that the backyard is taking
Change preposition
up the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 bigger space of the
school
 than the buildings.
Furthermore
 the
care
Correct your spelling
car
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 parking too Starting with the
care
Correct your spelling
car
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 parking in the old building which is invented in the north area of the
road
 just next to the main entrance. In comparison to the new building,
care park
Correct your spelling
Care Park
show examples
 2 will
be add
Change the verb form
be added
show examples
 to the main one and will be on the right north side of the
school
.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
road
 in the new building will be constructed to connect between the
care
 park 2 and car park 1 .
Furthermore
, there were 2
school
 buildings in 2004 that were not connected to each other and separated by
long
Add an article
a long
the long
show examples
 path that linked the sports field to the main entrance.
Whereas
, in the new building there will be a plan to increase the number of the buildings to 3
instead
 of 2 by changing the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
place of the sports field to the right south area just
bellow
Correct your spelling
below
show examples
 the
road
. Building three will be at
sports
Correct article usage
the sports
show examples
 field place on
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 north area and will be connected with building 1 through a path and building tow and one will be connected from inside with a
road
.
Submitted by dr.wessam_jamal on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore, instead".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words school, care, road with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "diagrams" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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