IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

The cahrt bel;ow illustrat which of three fast food restaurants were the most preffered amongst the teenagers in Vietnam and indonesia in 2017 and 2027.

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The given 4 pie charts illustrate which three fast food restaurants were the most preferred among
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in Vietnam and Indonesia in two different years 2017 and 2027.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
McDonald'a
Correct your spelling
McDonald

If you don’t want McDonald'a to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

was the most
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred

If you don’t want preffered to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

restaurant among
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 except for Vietnam in 2017. The popularity of Burger King among
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of both countries in both years experienced a decrease,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the popularity of KFC among both country
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 experienced an increase. In Indonesia in 2017, 60.8% of
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 preferred McDonald's, and in 2027, it decreased to 48.5%. Meanwhile, in Vietnam, in 2017, 43% of
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 preferred McDonald's
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 in 2027, it increased to 57.4%. In 2017, Burger King, was the most preferred
resaturants
Correct your spelling
restaurant

If you don’t want resaturants to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

among
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in
Vietnnam
Correct your spelling
Vietnam

If you don’t want Vietnnam to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

as 52% of
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 preferred it,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 in 2027, its popularity decreased, and only 39% of
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
preferrred
Correct your spelling
preferred
prefer

If you don’t want preferrred to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

Burger King. In 2017, the preference
of
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 KFC among
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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Vietnamese
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was

It seems that the verb were does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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 only 4%, and in 2027, it increased slightly to 6.3%.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in 2017, among
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
Indonesian
teenagers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, the
pupularity
Correct your spelling
popularity

If you don’t want pupularity to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

was 23%, and it increased dramatically to 39% in the year
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
2027.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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