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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spend their weekly income in 1968 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relavant

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spend their weekly income in 1968 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relavant
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The bar chart illustrates how families in a specific country allocated their weekly income across various categories in 1968 and 2018. In 1968,
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 accounted for the largest proportion of spending,
whereas
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 leisure became the dominant category by 2018. Over the 50-year period, significant increases were observed in spending on housing and transport,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the proportion spent on
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 experienced the most substantial decline. In 1968,
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 made up 35% of total expenditure, making it the largest category.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, other categories
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as housing, leisure, and clothing each accounted for around 10% of spending,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 fuel and power
comprised
Verb problem
accounted for

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
 only 6%. By 2018, spending patterns had changed dramatically. The proportion of income spent on
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 dropped sharply to approximately 17%, nearly half of its 1968 level. Leisure,
on the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, increased significantly, rising from 9% in 1968 to 23%, becoming the largest category. Housing
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 experienced substantial growth, nearly doubling from 10% in 1968 to around 19% in 2018. Transport saw a similar upward trend, increasing from 8% to 14%,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 spending on clothing and fuel declined slightly.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words food with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "substantial" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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