The tourism industry has grown enormously over the last fifty years, and there are few places which are unaffected by it. However, tourism rarely benefits the countries which tourists visit. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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For the
last
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fifty years, there has been a tremendous improvement or growth in the tourism industry across the world. People are visiting countries
except
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except for
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a few places. It is surprising that some claim that
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this
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these
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wonderful activities do not benefit the countries that host the tourists. I would straightway disagree with
this
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view for several reasons that we can discuss in
this
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essay. First of all, people bring money
money
Remove the redundancy
apply
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and would spend
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
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the destination nation for transportation, food and other leisure activities.
Therefore
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,
this
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will be a huge boost for their economy and
livelihood
Correct article usage
the livelihood
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of
local
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the local
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community.
For instance
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, hospitality is
main
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the main
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domain for Bali's budget.
Moreover
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, foreign people bring new perspectives and cultures to locals.
This
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can intrigue cultural
exhange
Correct your spelling
exchange
between locals and
foreginers
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foreigners
.
In addition
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, historical elements of
host
Correct article usage
the host
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country
being
Add a missing verb
are being
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passed to the rest of the world through international visitors.
This
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situation would bring respect to the citizens in the long run.
Submitted by alifahrc on

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Introduction
Ensure your introduction includes a clear statement of whether you agree or disagree with the statement and outline the main points you will discuss in the essay.
Structure
Organize paragraphs to clearly distinguish the discussion of economic benefits and cultural exchange as separate points.
Examples
Provide more specific examples and expand on them to strengthen your argument and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
Language/Vocabulary
Avoid repetition of words such as 'people' and 'money'. Use synonyms to maintain variety and interest.
Conclusion
Provide a conclusion that summarizes the main points discussed and clearly restates your stance on the topic.
Task Achievement
You present a clear argument supporting the positive impact of tourism on host countries.
Content
You have identified two key benefits of tourism: economic boost and cultural exchange.
Vocabulary
You convey your ideas using a good range of vocabulary and structure.
Analytical Approach
Your approach is balanced, acknowledging the complexity and different aspects of tourism.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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