IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You lost an item while travelling on a bus. An employee of the bus company assisted you in recovering your lost item. Write a letter to the company manager to thank the employee. In youro letter, - Describe what you lost and how the employee helped you find it - Say how you felt after recovering it - Explain why it was important to you

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Hi, my name is Jay. The person who lost the ring. You helped me
finding
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find
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 it through flashing all over the floor. I really felt relieved when I found it back. It was so important to me because my father bought it for me when I was a high school student. I was so nervous
for
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about
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 my CSAT, but my father said it was a ring of luck. I really appreciate it.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear logical progression of ideas throughout the letter.
coherence cohesion
Include a proper greeting and a respectful closing to enhance formality.
task achievement
Expand on how the employee assisted you to fully address the task.
task achievement
Provides specific details about the lost item and its significance.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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