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Band 5.5

The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of vegetables and fruits per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008

The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of vegetables and fruits per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008
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The given bar chart provides information on the proportion of individuals who
counsume
Correct your spelling
consume
consumed
 five portions of vegetables and fruits in a daily basis in the UK during eight
years
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the key feature in
this
Linking Words
 chart is that women had the highest rate followed by men
while
Linking Words
 children were the least consumers. Over the
years
Use synonyms
, the women's consumption ratio of vegetables and fruits had an upward trend starting from above 20% until it peaked at approximately 35% in 2008.
Then
Linking Words
 it witnessed a decline in 2007 about (32%) and 2008 (30%). The percentage of vegetables and fruits men ate remained stable in the first three
years
Use synonyms
 from 2001 to 2003
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 almost 18%. After
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 it started to increase in 2004 from around 23% to 28% in 2006 and 2007 to had a slight fall after that in 2008 with 26%.
Finally
Linking Words
,
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
 consumption proportion started at around 12% in the first three
years
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 it increased from 17% in 2004 to a peak at 25% in 2007.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption patterns
  • public health campaigns
  • government policies
  • lifestyle choices
  • economic factors
  • public health outcomes
  • supermarkets
  • food suppliers
  • regional differences
  • promoting consumption
  • inhibiting consumption
  • fruits and vegetables
  • eating habits
  • trend analysis
  • increase/decrease in consumption
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