In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose art (e.g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e.g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed?

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this

Linking Words

modern

era

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era,

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there is still some gender predominance in certain study areas

such

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females

Fix the agreement mistake

female

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alumni

prefer

Wrong verb form

preferring

show examples

art related

Add a hyphen

art-related

show examples

courses and males

prefer

Wrong verb form

preferring

show examples

science related

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science-related

show examples

ones. there are

multiples

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multiple

show examples

reasons for

this

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between them some

physiologicals

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physiological

that

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ones that

show examples

this

Linking Words

essay will focus

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on.

show examples

Historicaly

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Historically

, women have been

know

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knowing

known

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for

been

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being

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caring and more

emocional

Correct your spelling

emotional

and men for being more logical, recent studies had

demostrate

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demonstrated

demonstrate

that is

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people are more

incline

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inclined

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to more creative and

emocional

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emotional

depending

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show examples

their

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the

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part of their brain they develop more, on

one

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the one

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hand, the left lobe is related to being more analytic, factual and logical,

this

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side is mostly developed by men.

on the other hand

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, the right lobe is related to being more creative,

emocional

Correct your spelling

emotional

. mostly developed by women.

However

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, the number of people developing the other brain's side that the gender usually

use

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uses

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is increasing the inclination still

prevail

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prevails

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. Some high education

centers

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centres

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in an

attemp

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attempt

chage

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change

this

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tendency and make seminars equally gender

balance

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balanced

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had

mede

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made

an experiment

were

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where

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they set a rule that it was

conpulsory

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compulsory

that every course had the same

femenine

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feminine

and masculine pupils

otherwise

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the

couses

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courses

causes

werent

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weren't

allowed to start.

as a result

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some lectures were balanced like politics and economic

nevertheless

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pure sciences seminars like experimental physics and advance mathematics had to

be cancel

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be canceled

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because of the lack of even one woman,

this

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has

demostrated

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demonstrated

that

this

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preference will still prevail for a significant time

becouse

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because

it cause is

signifincantly

Correct your spelling

significantly

significant

physiological

although

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evolution is starting to kick, it will take a long time. in conclusion,

this

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essay firmly

belive

Verb problem

believes

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that the prevalence

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of more

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girls in some professions and boys in others is the result of a physiological

respont

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response

respond

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Furthermore

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Furthermore,

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it will continue unless

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the human's

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human's

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human

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brain

evolve

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evolves

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samy150211Fri Jan 24 2025

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic, but it could be more focused and clear in terms of task response. Make sure that the reasons and conclusions you provide are directly tied to the questions asked.

task achievement

When discussing historical gender tendencies, try to include evidence or examples that support your points more explicitly.

task achievement

Consider providing more variety in your examples to encompass a broader range of experiences and account for differing perspectives.

coherence cohesion

Your essay features a logical structure, but the connections between points could be enhanced. Consistently link each paragraph's main point back to the central argument of the essay.

coherence cohesion

Clearly define terms like 'physiological reasons' to help readers follow your argument more effectively.

introduction conclusion present

Your essay clearly introduces the topic and approaches the discussion thoughtfully, indicating the scope and direction of your argument right from the start.

introduction conclusion present

You concluded your essay with a strong, confident statement that summarizes your main argument, which helps to leave a lasting impression.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender roles
career paths
traditional stereotypes
unconscious bias
role models
learning styles
analytical skills
inclusive environment
gender balance
diversifying perspectives
socio-cultural norms
self-fulfilling prophecy

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In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose art (e.g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e.g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed?

Your opinion

It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that children’s time outside of school should be filled with scheduled activities such as art and music classes and sports. Others feel that children need free time to play and relax. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.